This one says a lot of terms involving clinical diagnosis, sterilized hardware, and prescriptions for potent pain medication. It's Nelson Philippe's presentation of "My Left Foot".
Photo: Nelson Philippe twitpic
It used to be called "Tony George's Folly." The name alone sent most wags and pundits into paroxysms of ironic laughter.
With apologies to the Monkees (and to you for bringing up the Monkees), that was then. This is now.
Vision Racing has gone from being the paddock joke to a sentimental favorite among IRL fans, and it has done so on the strength of an unprecedented and trend-setting outreach led by its crack PR staff, its drivers, and one of its owners.
All you have to do is look at the explosion in popularity of the team's "tweetups" - get-togethers at IRL events organized via the team's Twitter feed - to see how eager the team is to engage the series' fans. Starting as something of a lark, the concept proved to be so popular that the most recent tweetup at Chicago featured Curt Cavin emceeing, loads of guest drivers and personalities, and even a speaking part for "friend of the blog" Pressdog.
In the hands of Vision's PR chiefs Michael Kaltenmark and Pat Caporali, the Vision Racing Twitter feed is one of the most popular destinations of its kind in motorsports. Michael and Pat believe that public relations means reaching out to the public instead of shielding their clients from it - a somewhat old-school approach in their field these days. Vision driver Ed Carpenter has gotten into the act too, putting his Twitter URL on his helmet and making sure to tweet often.
Perhaps most intriguing are Lauren George's regular blogs at Vision's website. Frank, funny, and surprisingly revealing, Lauren's observations run the gamut from action on the track to experiences off it, all within the context of one of open-wheel racing's most famous (and, in some corners, criticized) first families. They're compelling reading, refreshing for their unexpected honesty.
Vision Racing isn't the only team doing these things but they're one of the only teams that make it appear as if the fans are partners and collaborators in their racing enterprise. In an age of red car dominance and diva drivers, what used to be an IRL irony has turned into a fan favorite.
Welcome to Chicagoland, located just outside the Windy City of Chicago, where it is not only windy but also cold. Or, as the locals are known to say, "butt cold". In the 50s (Fahrenheit, that is), which is substantially less than the 110-degree sunshine we're enjoying here at My Name Is IRL World HQ. We here will be sweating for all y'all at the race.
Today's big story is the anticipation of some side-by-side racing since this is not only the location of three of the five closest finishes ever, but the last super speedway race at Kentucky was decided by about the distance of Ed Carpenter's shaking arm. We just hope an underdog - ANY underdog - can make a run to the front. It's gotten so bad we're considering Tony Kanaan an underdog.
Also, for the FishHeads in the audience, please be advised that due to Dario's revolving sponsorship deal his car tonight will look nearly identical to Sarah Fisher's. If you see a yellow car near the front to not instinctively reach for a paper bag to breath into.
And with that, it's time to start.
0: We're 5 minutes into the broadcast and Jack Arute has already used the term "plummeting temperatures" several times. Smells like a drinking term, and quite frankly it looks like a little flask of liquid warmth might come in handy tonight.
0: Lindy in the sky(lair) without diamonds, but she is sporting a a big honkin' watch.
0: Robbie Buhl interviews Ed Carpenter. No offense, but this totally pales in comparison to pressdog's Q&A with Ed.
0: Arute is interviewing Kanaan in what looks like a dark alley. It's like an episode of "Cops". I kinda hope Kanaan takes off running and makes Jack chase him down.
0: Robbie is interviewing the always ebullient Helio. P1 just chirped "I know why Helio's so happy. He drinks to much coffee. Or there's something wrong with him." That's my girl!
0: Nostrabeekhuis is goving over telemetry relating to the Will Power/Nelson Philippe incident. Apparently the docs looked at the telemetry and said "Hey Will, your back is broken". Will was probably relieved, although he was also probably looking for his missing teeth.
0: We just learned Ryan Briscoe plays rugby. Riiiiiiight. I'm not douubting he loves the sport, but Ryan's about as big as me, which means he'd get snapped like a twig in the first scrum of the match.
0: Danica has a fetching beanie cap on her melon, looking like she's about to bust out a skateboard. With her contract ending maybe she's trying to suggest we start a rumor about her joining the Olympic snowboard team.
0: Why does Danica get the soaring inspirational soundtrack during her Jack Arute Interrogation? Everyone else got some creepy new-agey crap that sounded straight outta the X-Files.
0: Danica likes to drink wine. And clean the house. And pick up dog crap. For a brief moment, I was almost in love with her there.
0: Robbie Floyd just said this race will be the closest Hideki Mutoh gets to home all year. Uh, what about Motegi?
0: Robbie and Tony Kanaan were asking what kind of girlfriend he's like. "I don't care." Now, more than ever, Hideki needs to take the offer of our own Shane Rogers to serve as his wingman.
0: Let's warm up these cars and get this baby underway before it becomes a Sunday race.
0: I think Deiter from the SNL "Sprockets" skit says "Ladies and gentlemen, start your engines." Now is the time on Sprockets when we dance!
0: Warm up laps. Literally. Briscoe and Castrovenes will lead them to the green flag.
1: And we're green. Fugly. Totally spread out.
2: Kanaan is contesting Dario for third. Tony is driving the Oscar Mayer wienermobile. Has an board camera. Weiner cam?
7: Kanaan drops, Dixon moves up, and here come Ed Carpenter going after the Top 5.
8: Dixon is flying, up to 2nd.
10: Briscoe, Dixon, Dario, Helio, Ed. Help us Obi-Ed, you're our only hope.
11: Dixon contesting for the lead. If he's conserving fuel then I'm a Chinese fighter pilot.
13: Dixon drops back behind Briscoe. Now he's conserving fuel. After the season finale here in 2007 you can't say the phrase "fuel conservation" without saying "Scott Dixon".
17: Ed gets around Helio for 4th. Admit it - you're rooting for Ed tonight. It's OK, you're in good company.
24: Tomas Scheckter nearly takes the front wing off Danica. Robbie Buhl then says "The spotter is just a tool". I just spewed adult beverage all over my laptop.
29: Scheckter is on the move. He's up to 9th. Probably itching to pass 7 cars in one turn as he's done in the past.
32: Graham Rahal, battling Mario Moraes for 6th, nearly puts Moraes in the grass. Jonas Brothers song of the day:: "Hold On!"
39: Since he's been tucked behind Briscoe for 20 laps, do we really need Arute to tell us Scott Dixon is making fuel? Elsewhere, water is wet.
40: Speaking of, when are these cars due for pit stops?
44: Ryan Hunter-Reay is the first to make a pit stop.
45: And Viso. And Fisher. And Conway. And the Weinermobile. And Marco. And Scheckter.
47: Briscoe pits. So does Ed. That means Dixon will pit in about 5 laps.
49: Helio pits. And here comes Dixon and Dario. On exit Briscoe gets around Dario. Helio is behind them. It's now Dixon, Briscoe, Dario, Helio...and Scheckter!
53: Tomas is all up in Ed's business. The front four have pulled away by a few seconds but the nine or so cars behind them are, well, you could throw the proverbial blanket over them.
57: Sensing fans irritation at fuel conservation, Briscoe and Dixon go wheel-to-wheel for the lead. Briscoe's even using The Button in an attempt to get around him.
62: It took him 5 laps but Briscoe finally got around Dixon. It's Penske, Ganassi, Penske, Ganassi - but at least they're racing each other.
72: Marco has to pit because he didn't get enough fuel on his pit stop. Bummer, especially since I think I picked him in my TSO fantasy league.
76: The leaders approach slower traffic and Helio takes the lead. Goes three-wide around Easy Conweasy and Viso to take the lead.
80: Viso and Dixon are going wheel-to-wheel for the first time all year. It won't last, but we can enjoy the moment.
82: Helio, Dixon, Dario, Briscoe, Ed. Scheckter still all over him.
83: All those drivers in the second pack need a yellow to catch back up with the Big Two. Milka Duno, paging Milka Duno.
89: Still no yellows, and the average race speed exceeds 210 mph. This race might actually finish at a reasonable hour. Well, on the West Coast, at least.
92: YELLOW for Mutoh, who is into the wall. He must have thought I was talking to him when I said "Paging Milka". Skidding sideways, throwing dust and possibly marbles everywhere. Slides down the track and looks to be OK. But we're gonna bunch up on the restart.
95: Free ethanol for everyone! Let's all pit together, and on exit it is...Dixon, Helio, Dario, Ed, Scheckter. Briscoe stuck a few extra moments in the pits, dropping back behind Moraes and Matos.
97: Dan Wheldon appears to be done in the pits. @16AndGeorgetown says "Looks like Wheldon Schecktered his Dallara".
102: Back to GREEN, and Ed tries to get the jump on Dario. No dice. Moraes pulls along side of Scheckter, Dixon pulls inside of Helio. It's called racing.
104: Mario Moraes gets around Scheckter and Ed as well. Closing in on Dario. Wow.
106: Dear Lord, this is just beautiful.
109: YELLOW for another AGR car. Marco got up to high, left some tire marks on the wall, through some dust up, but nothing wrecked. Hey, what's another pit stop to him at this point.
110: How bad has Panther's season gone? Wheldon got interviewed for about 10 seconds before being interrupted by Marco's incident.
112: Tomas Schekcter is in third. D&R is banging on the podium for the second consecutive race. Check for a plague of toads in tiny peacoats outside of Chicago.
113: Most drivers pull off to pit again, but some don't. That means your leaders are now Scheckter, Kanaan and Moraes. Praying for rain, every one of them.
117: Back to GREEN, and Dario TOTALLY jumps the start. Or brilliantly times it. Either way he's around Moraes and into 3rd. Meanwhile Kanaan takes the lead.
120: Kanaan, Scheckter, Dario, Ed, Moraes. 14 cars separated by less than a second. Hallelujah!
122: I'm just going to sit back and enjoy this before the Big Two ruin it all.
124: That didn't last long. Dario and Dixon charge to the front and claim P1 and P2.
131: Dario, Dixon, Moraes, Kanaan, Servia. How many of you even knew Oriol was in this race?
133: Dario, Dixon and Mario Jonas are starting to separate a bit. Does this mean we all have to start rooting for Moraes?
140: I don't know how, but Marco is still on the lead lap, 2.5 seconds back, in 12th. Ahead of Helio, no less.
143: Milka is parked in the pits. Wait...false alarm, she's going back out to valiantly fall even more laps down.
148: Make that a foursome up front, as Ryan Briscoe has moved up to P4. He can't let Moraes break the Evil Empire's stranglehold on the podium.
155: Kanaan pits all by himself. Meanwhile Briscoe has vanquished Moraes to take 3rd.
157: Briscoe takes second from Dixon.
159: Dario pulls off for his final pit stop. And the tire jack gets stuck under his car, losing a precious second or two.
162: Briscoe makes his final pit stop. Dixon regains the lead.
164: Here's Ed Carpenter making his final stop. Dixon, Helio, Rahal and Danica are the last ones on the lead lap.
165: And Danica and Rahal pit. And Dixon too. Helio behind him. Dixon is out first.
166: Here comes Brisoce, around Helio, but still too far behind Dixon. After all of that it's Dixon, Briscoe, Helio, Dario, Moraes.
170: Ganassi, Penske, Penske, Ganassi - but they're aren't really close to each other anymore. I sure hope after all this spectacular racing it doesn't all go to crap in the final laps.
175: Would you believe Marco, Graham and Moraes are all battling for 5th right now? Ed's up there with them as well. Kudos to VERSUS for giving them air time.
184: YELLOW for Helio! The #3 is sliding down the front stretch. Replay shows the super perfect Team Penske car just broke. Let's bunch 'em up and take one more shot at this.
185: Dixon, Dario, Briscoe, Marco, Moraes. After a bad pit stop and grazing the wall Marco is thisclose to the podium. Impressive.
188: Arute is going over who has how many pushes of the Push To Overtake button left. I'm going to be heretical here and say it doesn't matter. In fact, it appears about as useful as the "Close Door" button on elevators. I just don't see it helping drivers actually passing each other as much as the other changes.
191: Back to GREEN! And Rahal and Marco and Moraes and Ed get back to dicing among each other.
193: Rahal gets 4th, no 3rd around Dario!
195: Dario back in third, but it's a race.
196: Briscoe pulls along side of Dixon. Rahal right behind him.
198: Three wide for the lead!
199: White flag. Rahal has deopped back, but Moraes jumps up. Dixon and Briscoe side by side and the winner is...
200: Ryan Briscoe! Years ago he left this track in an ambulance, but tonight he'll leave vie Victory Lane.
Fourth closest finish in IndyCar history. .0077 seconds. Wow! Man, after all the horrible oval races we saw this year it's great to see two straight close finishes - even if they were both won by the same guy.
Congrats to Briscoe on a race Roger Penske said was the best he'd ever seen him run. Congrats to Dixon for finishing second at Chicagoland again, as well as Mario Moraes for claiming the third spot on the podium.
Now that's IndyCar racing, friends! And on a Saturday night, no less. I'm beginning to think I need to make a pilgrimage to this track some day. I hope you all enjoyed it as well. Drive safely, thank you very much, and good night.
At Sonoma this past weekend, a thinnish, balding guy sat at a table with Justin Wilson, Terry Angstadt, and Dallara's Andrea Toso and awkwardly introduced the IndyCar media to the next generation of "digital Indy."
I say "awkwardly" because Dave Kaemmer, CEO and lead programmer of iRacing.com, is an engineer and, like many (but not all) engineers his first and best skill is not the spoken word. Not to mention that facing a roomful of media is daunting even for practiced veterans.
What Kaemmer does best is program racing simulations. He is so good at this, in fact, that you can excuse the guy for saying, "Uh," a few more times than might otherwise be required.
Sitting in the Infineon Raceway media center, Kaemmer was twenty years removed from his first attempt to create a virtual Indy 500 experience. "Indy 500: The Simulation" - a brief promo roll of which Kaemmer played during the Sonoma press conference to chuckles and outright laughter - looks ridiculous today. Back in 1989, however, it was a staggering, jaw-dropping, incredible feat of PC simulation skill - particularly considering that this was the industry standard up until that point.
"Indy 500: The Simulation" gave gamers on the archaic, stone-aged PCs of the time the chance to not just drive virtual IndyCars, but run a four-lap qualifying session and then tackle the entire 500-mile race distance if they so chose. The number of people who could actually do this when the game was first released was rather small considering that nearly everyone had to drive the car using a keyboard.
Regardless, "Indy 500: The Simulation" sold like hotcakes, eventually allowing Kaemmer to turn his tiny Papyrus Design Group into the industry leader in racing simulation for the next decade and a half. More importantly, however, it put the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and IndyCar racing into the hands of consumers more directly than anything ever had before. For the first time in history, fans could "drive" at the fabled Brickyard and see the sport from the cockpit instead of a bleacher.
Is it simply coincidence that after "Indy 500: The Simulation" and its successors, "IndyCar Racing" and "IndyCar Racing 2" were released that IndyCar racing experienced one of the biggest booms in its history? Perhaps. But I choose to believe otherwise. I'm in the camp that believes that accurate games and simulations are invaluable tools to drive interest into the sports they simulate. A good hockey or baseball manager game, for instance, can lead a casual fan to discover the intricacies of a collective bargaining agreement, the whys and wherefores of free agency and player contracts, and the joys of salary cap management; and while that may sound boring to some, to others such an experience adds depth and intricacy to sports that may seem on the surface to be superficial and dull.
Considering that racing - particularly oval racing - is often called "superficial and dull" ("They just go around in circles!"), motorsports certainly benefits from racing simulations in that people who drive them almost invariably say afterwards, "Wow... I didn't know it was that difficult!"
Kaemmer's iRacing deal with the IRL is not the first to come down the pike - several Indy racing games have been released in the past few years - but it certainly is the most detailed and realistic. In fact, according to actual race drivers who have participated in the service as testers, developers, and even subscribers, iRacing's laser-scanned cars and tracks and meticulous physics modeling is so accurate that they can actually tweak the way they drive in the simulation and then see positive results in the real world.
But beyond their utility as a training tool for drivers, the virtual IndyCar and Indy Pro Series simulations at iRacing could do what their Kaemmer-built ancestors did back in the late '80s and early '90s - increase public interest in the IRL and Indy. And let's not mince words - this is a series that needs a shot in the arm. The moribund TV ratings haven't gotten much better after the unification and the public's discretionary income is being used less and less to see races in person. Giving people the chance to experience the excitement of Indy directly, first-hand, might help spur flagging interest in open-wheel racing.
At any rate, it's a better idea than hiring Gene Simmons. Just saying.
What does this one say?
(Photo: TrackSide Online.com)
Forgive the brief administrative note, but after much consideration it has been determined that the time has come to pull the plug on the Anonymous family's contributions here at My Name Is IRL.
When your humble host first started this site it was a means to a conversation, and so I figured I would allow comments from readers who wished to remain Anonymous. It's all about sharing and inclusion among race fans here, even if that means correcting the host when he is in error, and if Tony George or Roger Penske or even Jim Nabors wanted to contribute something to our discussion then I wanted to offer them an option that allowed them to add something without feeling the need to reveal their super-stardom.
Unfortunately it hasn't worked out that way. While this site has been blessed with an amazing number of meaningful contributions by those have identified themselves, those comments by "Anonymous" have all too often featured personal mud-slinging at me or others. The tipping point for this decision was a recent post that featured multiple Anonymous readers arguing ridiculously with themselves in the comments section. (Seriously. As if we don't have enough message boards in the world for that kind of nonsense.)
So, my dearest Anonymous readers, it has been a fun ride, but it's over. I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt these past few years, but from here on out if you want to continue being a nattering nabob of negativity then you're gonna need to find yourself a moniker.
It's been two long years, but everyone's favorite environmentally friendly umlaut returns to the Indy Lights series this weekend.
Race car driver Leilani Münter will be back behind the wheel of a Firestone Indy Lights car at the season finale at Chicagoland Speedway on August 29. She will be driving under the umbrella of Team 3G, the IndyCar team which her driver coach Jaques Lazier races for. Her primary sponsor is Women's ExtenZe, an all natural herbal dietary supplement for women.I think "Women's ExtenZe" is some kind of, uh, female, umm, pleasure enhancer stuff, uh, of some sort. Quite frankly, I think this sponsorship is all wrong, because you could put the lovely Leilani's picture on a bottle of Snake Oil for Men and brighten just about any gentleman's day.
"I have dedicated the last two years of my life to spreading environmental awareness and unfortunately during that time, I haven't had sponsorship to continue with my racing career," said Münter, "I can't thank Women's ExtenZe enough for getting me back out on the racetrack where I belong."
(MORE from LeilaniMunter.com)
"We made quite a few passes on quite a few people, and at the end, Marco got into the back of me and spun me around. He came up and apologized. Definitely didn't do it on purpose. It was just one of those days. That's racing." - Scott Dixon, discussing the last-turn incident at Infineon Raceway that resulted in Marco being penalized for avoidable contact, and proving that The Iceman is either an emotionless robot or considering a ride with AGR next year.
Welcome to Sonoma, where sadly your humble host - despite planning to the contrary - is not in fact LIVE from Infineon Raceway. Instead I am firmly ensconced in a giant green La-Z-Boy here in sweltering Arizona sipping on a glass of cheap Cabernet. Not the full effect, but close.
Speaking of full effect, we will not be starting with the full field today after a practice accident yesterday involving Nelson Philippe spinning, stalling and being T-boned by Will Power.
Both drivers suffered concussions. Power also found himself with two fractured vertebrae while Philippe had an "open fracture" of his left foot. That means a bone was sticking out of his leg, and that ain't good. Fortunately, both have been reported to be recovering and are expected to race again another day.
And for those of you who think these Dallaras are ugly, yes, they have goofy looking needle noses - but they just may have saved Mr Philippe from having a Zanardi-like tragedy. Three cheers for technology!
Meanwhile the other big story today has to do with AGR, who despite downsizing their ownership is upsizing their race team today. In addition to their (ahem!) Fab Four they have added Franck Montagny, who may or may not be auditioning for a fulltime ride with AGR next year. He's French, so he may also just here for the wine and cheese.
And with that, it's time to start.
0: This race is taking place just outside of San Francisco, which among it's many offerings is a city known for it's cable cars. It's also known for people who get testy when you call those cable cars "trolleys". I'm only saying this because Robbie Floyd on VERSUS just called them "trolleys" like four times in the opening minutes.
0: Robbie makes up for his transgression by calling Graham Rahal "Grahamburglar".
0: Mario Moraes has already made an enemy, bumping Helio Castroneves off the track during today's morning warm-up.
0: It's gone under-reported, but Jack Arute will not be returning to ESPN next year. It appears he has shaved his head in protest.
0: In a pre-race segment EJ Viso puts a giant python or boa constrictor around Jack Arute, who says he hates snakes. Jack has so much in common with Indiana Jones it's scary.
0: This is THE LAST road course race of the year. Scott Dixon won the last won by 29 seconds. Why do I prefer ovals to road courses? One reason is because it's nearly impossible to win on oval by 29 seconds.
0: @curtcavin says "Will Power had his two front teeth knocked out in the crash (yesterday)". I hope he doesn't have the same dentist as Dan Wheldon.
0: Hey, we're about to start a race. Dario starts on the pole, followed by Briscoe, Helio, Marco, and Mutoh. Yes, Mutoh. Godzilla vs the Wine Spectator.
0: Let's start this race, 50 minutes after the broadcast began, shall we?
1: And we're GREEN...and in turn two it's total mayhem. Dixon rear-ends Kanaan, Kanaan knocks Viso off course, Danica and Rahal go sliding off course. Dixon has lost part of the front wing and is stalled on the turn.
2: And we're yellow. And Danica is in the pits. And her crew has wrenches out, so that's never good.
3: It's Franchitti, Briscoe and Helio leading the field.
4: Dixon in the pits. Kanaan in the pits. Grahamburglar in the pits and out of the car. Broke the drive shaft. And Viso's car is being wheeled behind the wall.
5: Back to GREEN. Everyone through the first few turns cleanly. Scott Dixon is back out in the back on the lead lap. I'm sure you were worried.
5: 5 laps in and Milka is in 14th. Shoulda picked her int the TrackSide Online fantasy league.
6: Justin Wilson started 22nd and is already up to 11th, because on road courses he's awesome. Of course, as I type this he pits for fuel and tires, falling back behind what cars are left on the track.
8: Mutoh is in 4th, Wheldon is in 5th. Wheldon in 5th on a road course? Really???
9: @paultracy3 tweets "Holy sh-t, that was a crazy lap, all that chrome horn. I'm sure someone will say it's my fault." I never thought I'd say that, but I have to admit: I'm a fan.
14: Dario, Briscoe, Helio, Mutoh (all over his bumper) and Moraes. Guess he got around Wheldon. Would have been nice to see that.
14: Oh look, here's footage of Moraes passing Wheldon. Thanks, VERSUS.
15: @HVMracing says "13 car cannot be repaired in time to return to the race." Who else wants EJ to grab a snake and terrorizes Arute some more?
17: Ryan Briscoe is in second, happy to not pass Dario because he's gaining points on Dixon. Further proof Briscoe is the Mortal Enemy of Fun.
18: Meanwhile Mutoh is still all up in Helio's business but he can't get past him because there's like two passing zones on the entire track. That's why this track has been called "Infini-yawn" or "Snore-noma".
21: Ed carpenter is 12th on a road course. If he makes the Top 10 we may all need to send flowers and chocolates to VisionRacing.
22: Milka has fallen back to 20th. I didn't know there were 20 cars left in this race.
24: Dixon pits. Does this even matter now? He's so far back they might as well be showing my extremely distant cousin Richard Antinucci making a pit stop. And since I mentioned it, my cuz is up to 11th today thank you very much.
26: Wheldon relinquishes 6th by pitting. Gets a wing adjustment to that cattle-guard looking abomination of excessive downforce.
26: Hunter-Reay, who had moved up to 8th, pits. Having a nice run for Foyt today.
27: Briscoe pits. So does Moraes and Mutoh. All out in the order they came in but Mario Jonas almost pulled out before the fuel hose was disengaged. A split second earlier and he could have been "Burning Up". (That's Jonas Brothers humor for those of you over 12.)
28: Franchitti pits. In and out, still in the lead.
29: Hunter-Reay back in the pits after he lost some of his wing trying to get around Oriol Servia. So much for that great day.
30: Dixon and Wilson racing for position. Cameras are spinning. Tens of home viewers experience vertigo.
30: Richard Antinucci sighting! He's directly behind Wilson racing for position. Using all of the track and some of the grass.
32: Antinucci gets around Wilson for 14th! All five members of Team 3G enjoy their first celebration of the season.
33: After all the pits stop it's still Dario, Briscoe, Helio, Mutoh, Moraes.
34: Conway has moved up to 7th, right behind Wheldon. Might be feeling the need to wreck soon. Conway is sponsored by "TranSystems", which is quite the name to be sporting in the bay area. Those of you who live there know what I'm sayin'.
36: We're watching a battle for 11th with Doorbos and Dixon. Is it me or does it look like Doornbos ripped off Danica's livery? Is he going to be doing commercials with men in skirts soon?
38: Helio has closed in on Briscoe, but if you think he's going to pass his teammate, who's a lot closer to the series title, you're probably smoking crack right now.
40: Milka, operating in the IndyCar GT class, is slowing down various drivers. It may be unsafe, but it makes for interesting TV.
42: We're told that Power and Philippe are watching in the hospital. Here in the My Name Is IRL World HQ, Link asks "You think they're sharing a room?"
44: Franck Montagny, driving what looks exactly like an AFS/AGR IOndy Lights entry, is in the pits for an extended stay. Not a good weekend for Frenchmen in Sonoma.
45: Same Top 5 as it was 20 laps ago. Smells like an outbreak of fuel conservation.
46: OMG! VERSUS voice-over promoting the IndyCar championship battle said "Fran-chitty". FAIL!
47: Just noticed on a wide-angle shot the TENS of fans at the race. I think I can almost identify @DiecastDude.
48: Briscoe gets squirrely, threatening the lock step. Helio, loyal teammate that he is, does not pass. Lock step resumes.
51: The lock step continues, but the top three of Dario, Briscoe and Helio are so close you could throw a blanket over them. Meanwhile, Mutoh and Moraes (4th and 5th) make their pit stops.
53: SWEET MOTHER OF ATTENUATORS! Helio nearly rear ends Briscoe as Ryan slows to make a turn while Helio continues straight on into the pits. Roger Penske's hair turns another shade of white. Helio out.
54: Helio and Kanaan go wheel-to-wheel...and the director cuts away to show Briscoe pitting. WTF? Replay shows the two Brazilians bump, sending Helio into the air. Note to whoever is in charge: when Helio and Kanaan are driving together you NEVER switch cameras!
55: It appears Helio has a cut tire from the incident, but he's hanging in 3rd. Dario makes his final pit stop and keeps the lead.
56: Good news: Graham Rahal's car is back on pit road. Bad news: the team is simply practicing changing tires.
58: Helio blew a tire, pitted, and is still in third. That Penske team is something else.
59: Mutoh stalking Helio like Godzilla going after the Smog Monster. Mutoh about to pass Helio...and we cut away again to show a taped pass of Wilson getting around Wheldon. *slamming head on armrest*
60: Mutoh gets around Helio, we see it on tape delay. Passing on VERSUS is only shown on tape delay. And for what it's worth he's 12 seconds behind Briscoe for 2nd.
62: Hang on: Dario and Briscoe are closing on on Milka.
62: And she let them around. Where's the fun in that?
66: YELLOW! We got Helio parked in the dirt. Entered the first turn and the car elected to not turn. Much dirt thrown about.
66: Elsewhere on the track Ryan Hunter-Reay is stalled on the course. In car-camera (and audio) reveals a dead motor. Just died like a stricken beast. I think that's like the third Honda motor ever to give up the ghost during a race.
69: We're gonna get ourselves a restart with the leaders all bunched back up. Dario, Briscoe, Mutoh, Moraes, Conway. Wow. Even Con-weasie is up there.
70: Jack Arute just said to look for Justin Wilson to make a charge to the podioum in the restart. He's in 7th. On a road course. Arute is clearly smoking the wacky tobaccy.
70: Arute also said "Grandma, put your teeth in your pocket because it's about to get wild!" Sweet lord, I need a defibrillator.
71: Back to GREEN, and Wilson can't get around Oriol Servia. He's trying, though. And quite frankly I could kiss whoever came up with the in-car camera right now.
72: Conway gets around Moraes...and then Mutoh for third. Easy cheesy, conweasy!
73: Whoopsie! Wilson tries get around Servia, slides sideways, does not stall, and despite surrendering a couple of positions stays on course.
74: White flag. Conway all over Briscoe. Showing some killer instinct.
75: Dario wins, with Briscoe and Conway less than a car-length behind each other. Meanwhile Dixon spins in the last corner and drops to 14th. Much rejoicing among my Dixon-hating kids right now.
Replay shows Marco punted Dixon in that last turn. If Dixon loses the title this year Marco won't be tweeting anymore about "having dinner at St Elmo's with Dixie."
Ryan Briscoe finishes 2nd for the 7th time this year. He only beats little guys like Justin Wilson and Ed Carpenter. Dario is too much for him to overcome, but if he wins the series championship I'm sure he won't be terribly bothered.
Congrats to Dario, Ryan, and Mike Conway, who snuck up on everyone and snagged a spot at the podium. This should afford him a valuable opportunity to introduce himself to Dario and Ryan.
That's it for me. Dario may have gone uncontested all day but I gotta say that was actually an interesting race. Seriously, this may be the first Sonoma IndyCar race where no one here at the World HQ didn't fall asleep. That's saying something.
Take care, drive safely, thank you very much, and good night.
Good news, IRL-o-philes! Danica Patrick, erstwhile Maxim model, former winner of the informal "Most Awkward Cheesecake Photo Pose Ever," current Go-Daddy Girl and - oh yeah - racing driver, told Sports Illustrated's Bruce Martin that she is likely to stay in the IndyCar Series instead of making a rumored (and extremely ill-advised) move to NASCAR.
The onetime one-time IRL race winner and famed Indy 500 top-fiver has seen a breakthrough in negotiations with Andretti-Green Racing after it was announced this week that AGR will split its promotions arm off into a separate concern. According to Patrick, having to deal with AGR partners Kevin Savoree and Kim Green was one of the reasons why she was looking at tin-tops in the first place:
"Yes, I would prefer to talk to Mike than to Kevin because he is a larger owner in the team, and when I talk to Mike things get done... I believe his heart is in it and he has a passion for everything from the business to the driving side, and he can relate to what the driver does as well."Reading between the lines, of course, one gets the sense that Danica's asking price of $17 million for three seasons behind the wheel likely didn't go down Savoree's craw as smoothly as it might have Andretti's. Anyone connected to the IRL knows that, for better or for worse, Danica can write her own check because of the absolutely disproportionate level of exposure she generates for the league compared to virtually anything else besides the 500-mile race itself. But it is possible that Savoree, concerned with not only the competition side of the AGR business but also with its promotions arm and other assorted responsibilities, could have seen the giant chunk of cash destined for Ms. Hospenthal's bank accounts and had a minor bout of skepticism.
