In case you haven't seen the "banned by Fox" GoDaddy ad featuring Danica Patrick, allow me to congratulate you on your overwhelming sense of decency. Because I know my children are prone to reading this site I will summarize by saying Danica is talking about her, umm, furry little dam builder.
Which would have been nothing, were it not for the fact that mere days after the release of this commercial, the pilot of the #7 has been nominated by Nickelodeon for a Kids Choice Award as Favorite Female Athelete.
Are you kidding me?
Danica is many things, but I think at this point she's may have gone off the cliff as a Kid's Choice. You can't be making ads like that and still be a paragon towards childlike virtue. Our buddy pressdog has taken her to task for not being able to live up to this nomination, and now your humble host offers an Open Letter plea to the raven-haired one.
Dear Mrs Hospenthal,
I’m a big fan of your IndyCar career, and as such I though it was time to pass a note to you. You’ve done a lot of great work in promoting the Indy Racing League the last few years by probably saving the series from certain financial ruin, but more so for me personally your competitive runs have intrigued my oldest daughter enough that she now shares a passion for racing as well. Fortunately she doesn't share your passion for F-bombs (at least not yet) so for those other contributions I will always be grateful to you.
I understand that part of the reason – OK, most of the reason – for your popularity is due to your relentless branding towards a “sexy” image. I get that this somehow sells phones and antifreeze and pastries and pays the bills for you because your sponsors really dig the whole “hot chick in a fast car” thing. That’s all well and good, but even you should realize there’s a difference between “sexy” and “trashy”.
And that new GoDaddy “Beaver” ad of yours is clearly the latter.
Despite the fact that you were made to look like you were completely undressing in public before paparazzi for no apparent reason, I don’t have any particular moral objections to that commercial that Fox rejected. However I do think the folks at Fox were doing you and your sponsor a favor by keeping it off the airwaves, because that was the far and away the most lame, ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen you do. And I'm counting last year's ad. This new one was like someone let a 14-year-old boy write the script, and honestly I thought your appeal was trying to be a bit beyond the Beavis and Butthead crowd. I suppose you were trying to go for laughs with the whole debacle, but “where’s the beaver” isn’t going to get them.
Come on - you were talking about "my beaver". To the camera.
So as a fan I’m politely asking you to try being a bit more judicious in your self-promotion. Embarrassing yourself with this juvenile nonsense isn’t going to help you land future sponsorship deals (Larry Flynt not withstanding), isn't going to advance auto racing, and it certainly isn’t going to help your current image with fans like me or my daughter. What it will do is make many of us question your true intentions, because since you have reached the top of the marketing ladder we can only presume that you are able to make select from many choices of ad campaigns for which you wish to appear as a representative.
Please choose more carefully before you become a liability instead of an asset to the sport we love. We care about you and your career, but not necessarily your beaver.
My Name Is IRL
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