Welcome to Kansas where your humble host is glad to not be. Not because I'd rather be at home than at a track - oh, heavens no - but because Kansas seems to be always be place where Mother Nature has her huge hissy fits or meteorological fury.

Last year there were tornadoes all around the track, and this week there's been lots of rain. Might even be a little on the chilly side according to the braintrust at TrackSide Online. Hopefully the track will stay dry for today's race, as the qualifications

(Meanwhile, here in Arizona it's Chamber of Commerce weather. Sunny, clear, high in the 70s. If anyone wants to have an IndyCar race here instead...I know, I'm beating dead horse here.)

But the weather right now looks clear in Kansas, and if qualifications are any indication we might have a fun race, since cars from Panther, Newman-Haas-no Lanigan, and FAZZT (yes, FAZZT) were all qualifying in the front rows. Wheldon however was penalized for going below the white line in quals so he gets to start in the back fully enraged.

But Briscoe is on the pole, Milka is starting in the back, and somewhere Nicole Manske is getting her "#parkmilka" ready for today today. And with that, it's time to start.

0: Marty Reid just said "It is the Month of May". Technically, yes, but "The Month of May" proper doesn't start until Donald Davidson's "Talk of Gasoline Alley" is back on the airwaves. I'm calling today April 31st.

0: Ryan Hunter-Reay is being interviewed. He has some issues about something (contract? car?) but I can't focus because the ubiquitous IZOD Girl is standing behind him smiling encouragingly at me. Yes, me. And I'm suddenly feeling very calm.

0: I miss Jack Arute on these ESPN/ABC broadcasts. Rick DeBruhl just doesn't have the same level of passion or the probability for unintentional comedy. Might was well have a robot out there.

0: Marty Reid just said he was going to introduce us to "Silvester de Simona". Oh, COLOSSAL FAIL!

0: Obligatory Danica interview. ESPN loves the Danicker. However, the interview serves as a transition to a package on...Simona. Har!

0: Vintage Indy 500 footage breaks out. Unsers, Andretti, Wheldon. This is even more re-assuring than the IZOD Girl.

0: Some anonymous woman (to me) commands "Drivers! Start Your Engines!" Nice job, except for the shoulder shrug afterwards.

0: Dan Wheldon is the "in-car commentator". Dan starts talking about the great car and...he stalls it. Note: "in-car commentator" is rarely a good idea.

0: First oval in an IndyCar for Sato, Simona, Baguette and Romancini, although Mario Romancini has race in the Indy Lights. Then again, he also put the car in the wall in practice.

0: John Andretti, sporting classic Petty colors, gets air. Meanwhile Briscoe and Dixon lead them to the line.

1: And we are GREEN! And cars are moving around going three-wide and life is worth living again.

2: Marco Andretti, who started in 26th, ais already up to 19th. Must be that Venom Energy Drink sponsor.

4: Conway and Mutoh are shown battling for 6th. On ESPN. There's nothing real in the world anymore.

5: It's Briscoe, Dixon, Dario, Helio, Vitor. Meira is already winless in 101 races

8: Hyphen-Reay started near the back but he's already up to 13th. Marco is up to 15th. It's a festival of overtaking!

12: Just noticed KVRT teammates Moraes and Viso are 8th and 9th respectively. Wonder if ESPN will mention them.

13: Dixon gets a little lose and loses 2nd to Dario. Franchitti has the Suave sponsorship this week to celebrate his glorious locks.

18: Danica is in 14th with Rafa Matos and John Andretti chasing her for position. How do I say that without making it sound like a double entendre?

21: Dixon gets back around Dario. Meanwhile that Top 5 of Briscoe, Dixon, Dario, Vitor, and Helio have about a two second lead on everyone else. Vitor, hanging with the big boys!

24: Ryan Hunter-Reay is up to 10th. Marco up to 11th. Kanaan in 7th. Andretti Autosport brigade is blaring trumpets and are on the charge.

28: Dixon is trying to go two-wide for the lead while trying to lap Romancini. Racing excitement engaged.

34: Back from commercial and Scott Dixon is now leading. Pass for the lead has to be shown on tape delay. Not quite as exciting.

40: Leaders are lapping plenty of drivers. Wilson, Milka, Simona, Lloyd and Romancini are all a lap down. Next up is Wheldon, who clearly doesn't have the same car he had yesterday.

42: And there goes Dixon by Wheldon.

43: Dixon is starting to make this less than interesting. He leads Briscoe and Dario by over 4 seconds. Helio 8 seconds back. Vitor 9 seconds back.

49: Pit stops for Briscoe, Kanaan, Helio, Dixon. Without incident.

50: Now Dario comes in. Must be saving a wee bit more fuel than the other leaders.

50: Will Power comes in and has an extended stay pit stop. Too far from the middle of the pit stall to get the fuel hose in completely. Crikey!

55: After all the stops it's Dixon, Dario, Briscoe, Helio, Vitor. Kanaan 6th. Hunter-Reay 7th.

58: Penalty of some sort for Viso on the pit stop. Now he's back to 18th. Dammit. So much for that interesting run.

65: Good news - Vitor is getting airtime in 5th. Bad news - he's 14 seconds back of the lead.

68: Mutoh and Sato battling for 11th. And here I am caught without any Godzilla references at the ready.

69: Danica, in 14th, about to be lapped by Dixon.

71: Down goes Danica. Next up is Marco.

72: Scott Dixon is the opposite of racing excitement. There, I said it.

73: YELLOW! Viso, clearly desperate for TV time, gets a little high and scrapes the wall. Manages to get the car into the pits though.

75: Pit stops for everyone. In and out and the leaders are now Dixon, Dario, Briscoe, Helio, Vitor. Hunter-Reay now up to 6th in a demonstrable plea for additional sponsorship to run the full season.

75: Chaos at the back of the field as Duno and Sato touch and drive each other into the grass. No wall contact though so they might be able to continue.

76: Ryan Briscoe is missing a wheel. That ain't gonna work. Has to come in get a fourth, dropping for 11th.

80: Interview with EJ. Poor guy.

82: Something must have happened to Vitor. Dixon, Dario, Helio, Kanaan and Hunter-Reay now lead the field.

84: Back to GREEN!

85: 16 cars on the lead lap. Danica is not one of them. But she's still getting airtime. Go figure.

89: Tagliani in 6th, Vitor right behind him. Hope springs eternal for the underdogs.

96: John Andretti is 9th. He's...not too bad at this IndyCar thing.

98: Hunter-Reay keeps looking to get a run on Kanaan but he can't. So we are lock-steppin' up at the front.

103: Danica, a lap down, throwing a big 'ol block party for Helio all around the track. Even Scott Goodyear calls that "bad etiquette".

108: Helio still struggling to get around Danica. Goodyear says "When he gets beside her he's got to hold her down..." Oh my!

109: Danica finally lets Helio by. And Kanaan as well for good measure. Must have heard from the Iron Hand of Justice.

113: Something must have happened to Hunter-Reay, as he's dropped back behind Tagliani and Mutoh. What it was, nobody knows.

114: And here's Danica making a pit stop. Really ESPN, this is embarrassing. Let go of the Danicker already.

119: YELLOW! Debris on the track. Looks like an endplate on the track so it's legit. Might have been thrown by Brian Barnhart himself, though. Just to keep things remotely interesting.

122: Pit stops for everyone. And on pit exit it's Dixon, Dario, Kanaan, Mutoh, Helio. Mutoh Mania rises to a near fever pitch.

127: So, exactly how long does it take to pick up an endplate on the track? It's been 8 laps, for crying out loud!

128: Finally, back to GREEN!

135: Lots of racing but not much passing, if that makes any sense. The Ganassi cars have already pulled away by almost a second from Kanaan. Try to act shocked.

143: And now it's two seconds between the Dixon-Dario combo and Kanaan. Meanwhile Briscoe is on the charge and working on Mutoh for 4th.

146: P1 just walked out of the room saying "Yeah for races that are boring". I would guess many of you watching this feel the same way.

151: Takuma Sato, reported "road course specialist", is up to 7th. Mutoh still in 4th. Japan is well represented this week.

155: Dixon-Dario ahead of Kanaan by 3.5 seconds. 45 laps to go and it's all over but the crying.

161: Final round of pit stops starting. Leaders not pitting yet. I know, that's not terribly helpful. Sorry.

165: Mutoh on the Push To Pass but he can't get around Kanaan. Insert Japanese swearing here.

170: Dixon now pulling ahead of Dario by two seconds, or so says Marty Reid. I can't verify it because Timing & Scoring is frozen at Lap 148 for me. Not very helpful.

175: Dixon ahead of Dario by almost 3 seconds now. Ahead of Kanaan by over 10 seconds. *sighs*

177: Kanaan and Mutoh both pit. Come out the same way they went in. Not even passing in the pits for those two.

178: Dixon pits and...YELLOW! Jay Howard has made contact with the wall. He seems OK, making hand gestures to the safety crew, but the car is missing the rear wing.

179: Replay shows Jay was behind teammate/boss Sarah Fisher and got a little too high. Or, based on the result, a lot too high.

180: Somehow in all this the leaders are now Dixon, Helio, Dario, Kanaan, Mutoh. Not sure how Helio snuck into second but there he is.

184: Finally, back to GREEN! And now YELLOW as Sato and Mutoh collide ending the proud run for Japan.

182: Ironically, if we finish under yellow it might actually be a closer margin of victory.

188: Still yellow. Big Jamie Little informs us that with 12 laps to go and Dixon has 18 Push To Pass tries left. Feel the anticipation of racing excitement leaving the building.

190: Only six cars on the lead lap. Dixon, Helio, Dario, Kanaan, Hunter-Reay, Briscoe. Pfffft.

193: And we're back to GREE...no, strike that. Waved it off.

194: And this time we're back to GREEN! Look at that Scott Dixon gooooooo!

196: Dario gets his Push To Pass on and gets around Helio for 2nd.

197: Here comes Kanaan up to Helio. Side-by-side (hooray!)

198: Kanaan got 'em.

199: White flag as Kanaan pulls up on Dario's attenuator.

200: And checkers for Dixon, as Franchitti holds off Kanaan for 2nd.

Congrats to Dixon, not for winning but for having a lovely wife who gleefully shares with us what Scott had for breakfast. Listening to her say "ba-nah-nah" is more exciting than watching him race. But that's just me.

Also, nice runs for Dario, Tony, Helio and the two Ryans. Hunter-Reay in 5th, now hanging in fourth place in the standings. I need to make like Scott Dixon and get moving in a hurry today, so with that I leave you all. Thank you very much, friends, and good night.

Welcome to Southern California where your humble host is LIVE on site for the 36th running of the Grand Prix of Long Beach. I've had a blast this weekend talking to race fans and now I'm going to sit down and bring this week's LiveBlog coverage from the spectacular vantage point of ...the basement of the media center.

Yes, it's the dirty little secret that when in the media the choices for covering the race are either (a) in the pits watching a TV monitor and not hearing anything or (b) sitting in a media center watching the VERSUS broadcast. I chose the latter since that's where the wi-fi is.

So today we have another street race, our third in four races, and who's on the pole but none other than Will Power. Not exactly shocking since his performance thusfar in 2010 has left everyone expecting him to run away with any street race. It's gotten so bad even Team Penske's Tim Cindric, on seeing Will running 4th on a practice session earlier this weekend, said coyly to Power "You sandbaging it out there today?"

But no matter, he's still gotta run the 85-lap race and Ryan Hunter-Reay, Justin Wilson and Power's teammates will be nipping at his heels. Or at least trying their best to nip at his heels.

And with that, it's time to start.

0: Cars are hot. Flyover conducted. TSO Patrick is sitting next to me chowing on some kind of Mexican meal. We are good to go.

0: One more lap to green. Curt Cavin is now down here. He's on the opposite side of the room with all those real media people, but I'm cool with that since I'm closer to "Leah" the hearing aid dog. She's staring at me, and with this Mexican food next to me I SWEAR I hear "You quiero Taco Bell".

1: And we are GREEN! Power leads the way but speaking of green Tony Kanaan jumps from 6th to 4th before the 1st turn. He's feeling the power of Brazilian fuel.

2: Power, Hunter-Reay, Wilson up front, but things get a little dicey around 9th as Tagliani cuts off Marco and appears to remove part of Andretti's front wingplate. Probably not the last piece of broken carbon fiber we'll see today.

4: The entire lap is run without any passes as the front three appear to separate from the pack. Did I mention Dixon and Franchitti are in 7th and 8th respectively. Somewhere Chip Ganassi is feeling unhappy and hugging a stuffed delta wing pillow.

6: Danica Patrick is in 20th. Even ESPN wouldn't be showing her that far back.

7: Milka Duno is at the back, 47 seconds off the pace. The lap times for the leaders are running around 71 seconds, and Milka is running 78 second laps. So she should get some TV airtime shortly.

10: Amazingly Ryan Hyphen-Reay is only 6 tenths of a second back of Power. There's a part of me that wonders if Power is sandbagging a bit conserving fuel here.

12: Milka is now 1 lap down, and since the leaders didn't pass here I'm guessing she had to make a pits stop before she became a factor.

14: Track feed shows Milka has been parked. In the pits with grooved tires now on the car. Somewhere Nicole Manske is doing a Snoopy Dance.

15: New last place car is Bertrand Baguette, 29 seconds back. If he plays his cards right this will be the only time I mention him all day.

18: Power appears to be slowing dramatically - like he missed a gear - and so Hunter-Reay and Wilson go right around him. Meanwhile, when no one was looking, Briscoe got around Helio for 5th.

20: IZOD poster boy Hunter-Reay is rocketing away and is now 1.5 seconds ahead of Wilson. Now would be a good time to mention that I'm currently wearing IZOD jeans. For real. Gotta represent the title sponsor.

21: Just checked the leaderboard. Power is still in 3rd but Dario, who's usually pretty tough on these street race deals, has dropped to 11th. Asheley can't blame that on Milka this week.

24: Here comes the strategy. Danica, Rafa and Simona all make pit stops.

25: Rafa pays the price as Hunter-Reay laps him after pit exit.

26: Dario pits. Sato pits. That can only mean one thing - he's still in the race. Other cars pit as well.

27: Finally a leader pits as Wilson makes a stop. Cleans stop, comes out on the blacks.

28: Hunter-Reay pits meaning Will Power once again leads. In and out like a professional.

29: LLoyd and Sato mix it up and Sato goes sideways into a runoff. Looks like Takuma didn't stall it so he's still racing. Meanwhile Kanaan and Helio made a pit stops.

30: Power finally pits, along with Briscoe and Tagliani. T&S indicates they were the last three to make a stop.

31: Televised overtaking breaks out as Kanaan gets around Briscoe and Helio makes a move to pass Tagliani. Top 5 are now Hunter-Reay, Wilson, Kanaan, Power, Briscoe.

32: Mario Moraes in 9th. Really? Not too shabby.

32: It's a celebration of televised overtaking, as Briscoe passes Kanaan for third and then Kanaan passes him right back a turn later through turns 4 and 5. Hooray for racing!

35: I've hear the N****R race in Texas was rained out today. Hopefully VERSUS - who graciously gave a group of IndyCar fans a tour of their trucks today - will benefit with a ratings bump. Hope springs eternal.

37: The Big Hyphen leads Wilson by over 2 seconds and Kanaan and Briscoe by over 7 seconds. Smell ya later, dudes.

38: I can't hear the VERSUS commentary, so if when Jack Arute says something memorable I'm going to be totally oblivious. My viewing is not enhanced.

40: Hunter-Reay, Wilson, Power, Kanaan, Briscoe. Simona 17th, Danica 18th for those who are interested.

43: Haven't had a yellow flag yet. Shades of Homestead in '09.

44: First to last on the track is a 48 second differential, so we aren't likely to see any lapped traffic come in to play.

46: Tagliani makes what's likely an unscheduled pit stop. Must not have gotten fully fueled on his first stop since it seemed like he only got more ethanol.

48: Evidently T&S was wrong since Hunter-Reay is now all up on Alex Lloyd and about to lap him. Meanwhile Wilson is closing on Hunter-Reay. Oh, the drama!

51: Wilson has caught Hunter-Reay, who is still battling to get around Lloyd. In fairness to Alex, he's running well and not exactly blocking.

53: And...finally Hunter-Reay gets around Lloyd. Wilson tries to duck underneath and OUCH Lloyd cuts him off and folds up Wilson's front wing. Oh, that's gonna be a pitstop.

54: Lloyd may have a cut tire as well as both he and Wilson pit. Dreyer & Reinbolds Larry Curry is shouting and finger-pointing at an official right now.

55: Hunter-Reay, Power, Kanaan, Dixon, Helio.

56: Pitstops for what seems like all the leaders so I have no idea who's leading. Maybe Dixon? Meanwhile Baguette is 11 laps off. Toasted in the pits with "mechanical" issues.

59: Dixon pits. The last driver left to make a second stop is Mike Conway. Leaders are now Hunter-Reay, Power, and Conweezy.

60: YELLOW! Rahal goes into the tires and Mario Romancini goes right into his attenuator. The Grahamerican jumps out of the car and goes over to "have words" with Mario. Replay shows Mario hip-checked Graham in a battle for 20th, and Graham got his hands off the steering wheel about a split second before incurring a broken wrist.

61: Apparently D&R's Larry Curry was not exactly pleased with race control either. He said "If Brian Barnhart won't do his job they need to get someone who can!" Much discussion regarding the concept of ordering drivers to allow themselves to be lapped breaks out all around.

65: Leaders are Hunter-Reay, Power, Wilson, Dixon, Kanaan. That yellow was good news for Justin but bad for his teammate Conway who hadn't yet made his 2nd pit stop.

66: Back to GREEN! And we are cleanly back to racing.

67: Wilson, enraged by earlier events, closes in and passes Will Power for second. Elsewhere Danica makes an aggressive more and passes Simona for 16th.

68: Hunter-Reay has a lead over Wilson of over three seconds. To quote Morrissey, stop me if you think that you've heard this one before.

69: Sato is kindly pulling aside and letting everyone not named "Milka" around him. He just wants everyone to get a better look at his stylin' ride.

72: Hunter-Reay's lead is up to 6 seconds, which may be due in part to the lapped Rafa Matos who seems to be holding up Wilson. Where's the love, Rafa?

74: Moraes is up to 6th. Really. Very stealth performance by the lost Jonas Brother today.

76: Hunter-Reay is in total control. Wouldn't be surprised if he soon starts tweeting from the car about how awesome his Dallara is handling.

79: True story: walking pit road during a practice session some guy came flying by me, tripped on the curb, and fell down. It was Michael Andretti, and in the second before he got up I momentarily panicked that he had snaped his ankle and everyone would blame me.

80: I only mention that because Andretti's team is about to get his first win in quite a few races. (Maybe Milwaukee in '08?)

81: Hunter-Reay by 5 seconds. Wilson, Power, Dixon, Kanaan. Moraes still hanging in 6th.

84: White flag. You know who by a comfortable margin. I'm sure IZOD is quite thrilled about their driver winning at Long Beach.

85: Checkered flag for Ryan Hunter-Reay, winner of the 36th Annual Toyota Grand Prix of Long Beach! A few folks here in the media center declared "that's kinda nice". If you mean seeing someone other than Team Penske win this year I'd say that's an understatement.

Post-race interviews deployed: Ryan says his car was "fun" a bunch of times. Dedicates his race to his mother who passed away last year. Gets some sugar from his main squeeze Beccy Gordon. Thanks IZOD and Michael Andretti.

Meanwhile...hey, I need to get ready for the post-race press conference! Sorry to cut things short today, so thanks to all of you for enjoying the race. I've got work to do, so thank you very much, and good night.

Welcome to Barber Motorsports Park, also known as "a beautiful facility". A gorgeous road course with a spectacular museum that, if previous auto races are any indication, promises to feature virtually no passing whatsoever today. But it's the "Augusta" of road courses.

Today's race features a compelling storyline of Will Power attempting to suffocate any hope for anyone else winning any races the rest of the year. The Toowoomba Tornado has won the first two races and starts from the pole today. Rumors are running through the paddock that he's a cyborg from the future sent to destroy Scott Dixon for the sake of humanity.

Meanwhile Mike Conway has qualified second, meaning he has two choice today. One: he can follow Power around all day and finish on the podium. Two: he can try to jump Power at the line and take an early lead, only to panicked into a mistake at some point later in the race. Choose wisely, anonymous redhead.

And with that, it's time to start.

0: Jack Arute is back, interviewing Helio. Jack was not part of the broadcast team for the last event for the St Pete race, one of the few IndyCar races he's ever missed. And of course the St Pete race was rained into a Monday morning. Coincidence? I think not. Somebody check Arute's home for sorcery paraphernalia.

0: Mike Conway is starting second, so he's getting an on-air interview for something other than a mid-race, post-wreck chit chat. And I could swear that Leona Lewis is wearing an IZOD firesuit and standing behind Conway during the interview.

0: Will Power enjoys his vegemite, so he's a bona fide Australian cyborg.

0: Marco Andretti has giant sunglasses with red lenses, smartly co-ordinated with his red and black firesuit. He's finished 23rd and 12th in two races this year, but despite that he's still exceptionally fashion conscious.

0: Justin Wilson says "a common misperception about me is that I'm tall". He made a funny. On a more serious note, if he can find a place to pass he could give Dreyer & Reinbold it's first win since 2000.

0: Jack Arute asks the burning question: "How do you pass when you can't pass?" It's not a real IndyCar race if Arute isn't making my brain explode with his mind-bending madness.

0: Charles Barkley's in the house. The Team Penske paddock, to be exact. Insert me imagining him telling their drivers "Paul Tracy is a knucklehead".

0: Now Barkley is talking to EJ Viso. EJ is about as big as Charles Barkley's leg.

0: Here's a perfectly-timed ad for Brazilian coffee. I think we all agree we're gonna need a whole lotta that beverage today.

0: We've gone 37 minutes into the broadcast and I don't think I've heard the name "Danica" mentioned once. How can this even be an IndyCar race with such an egregious omission?

0: Barber owner/president/overloard George Barber says "Ladies, gentlemen, ya'll start these engines." And the rows get "hot".

0: Power, Conway, Helio, Marco, Dixon and Sato will lead the way into the first turn. You don't need me to tell you first turn on a road or street course is often an improptu re-enactment of "Death Race".

1: And we are GREEN! And we are CLEAN through the opening turns.

2: Clean first lap. Everyone in single file formation. Apparently Dixon jumped the start (shocking, I know) and had to surrender back the position back to Marco. Power, Conway, Helio, Marco, Dixon lead the field.

6: Other than Dixon's jumped start we've had no televised passing yet. *sighs* Where's my coffee.

8: Timing and scoring indicates some passing back in the field...no, wait, that's just because Tagliani is pitting. Nevermind.

10: Romancini and Wheldon pit, trying to get off sequence. It's a celebration of pit strategy today. I tell ya, when you those IndyCar teams plan fuel strategy it's breathtaking wonder to behold.

12: YELLOW! Sato and his glorious Lotus livery is stalled on the course. This is happening during a GoDaddy commercial, which is the first appearance of Danica all day.

12: Delphi Safety team out to perform AAA duties and give him a tow to the nearest pit stall.

13: Lots of cars pit. Not all though. Helio, Marco and others stay out. And it looks like Conway has bested Power to the pit out line...wait, replay says NO! Power by a couple inches.

14: Now it's Helio, Marco, Dixon, Dario, Simona. Yet another Simona sighting near the front.

16: Back to GREEN! And Marco is all over Helio...hang on...maybe..maybe..YES! A televised overtake as occurred! Marco takes the lead, nearly running Helio into the beautiful grass at this beautiful facility.

18: Meanwhile Power and Conway are 13th and 14th respectively.

19: Holy smokes! Wilson just got around Hunter-Reay ON TV for 17th. And right after that Briscoe goes around Romancini for 15th. VERSUS is showing the passing but Jenkins and team are talking about something else. And now we go to commercial. *banging head on laptop*

22: Twitter is all abuzz with word that Taylor Hicks referred to this on IMS Radio as a Formula One race. FOUR TIMES.

23: Speaking of the number four, fourth televised overtake as COnway goes wheel-to-wheel and gets around Briscoe for 14th. I guess Power got around him at some point, but it was not suitable for television.

27: Marco is still leading. He has gone 54 INdyCar races since his lone series win. Calls to mind the Rocky Bobby line "If you ain't first, you're last".

28: In a related note I think this is Vitor Meira's 100th race. All winless. A moment of silence for all those second place finishes by Vitor.

29: Marco will pit. From red to black sidewalls. Helio assumes the lead.

30: I think Tagliani just got around Wheldon for 8th. There was a replay of a pass earlier so now we're up to SIX televised overtakes. I'm giddy like a schoolgirl.

31: Helio pits. This is a 90 lap race so he may try to go the distance on two stops. Comes out in front of Dixon, who was in 2nd. The leaders are now Marco, Helio, Dixon, Kanaan and Power. Looks like the fuel strategy by Kanaan and Power isn't looking so hot right now.

35: Tagliani and Hunter-Reay make pit stops. That's about all that's happening.

37: Hang on. Matos and Vitor are battling. Replay shows Matos nearly taking out Tagliani on pit exit. And back to live for a LIVE overtake of Matos by Vitor. Like Jack Daniels, that's Number 7!

41: Bob Jenkins tells us Takuma Sato is back on track. He's 21 laps down so I guess he has been for some time. I know, I really should look at the ticker on the screen more often.

42: Power, Conway, and Briscoe all pit. Haning together on a renegade pit strategy. Top 5 is now Marco, Helio, Dixon, Dario, Simona. Swiss Miss is all business today.

45: Replay shows Wheldon, Tagliani and Matos all passing Milka in one turn. Sorry, but passing Milka doesn't count as a televised overtake.

46: Mutoh, Sato, Rahal, and others are now going around the friendly moving chicane that is Milka Duno. Immediately afterwards Mutoh goes wide on exit or a turn and does a little lawn mowing. Nothing serious though, surrendering just one position.

47: Danica around Viso. Overtake number eight!

49: Timing and Scoring indicates not only has Alex Lloyd's car not failed him yet, but he's up to 8th. I sincerely hope I didn't just jinx him.

51: I'm a little disappointed they haven't said anything about the new guy named Baguette yet. Arute could go to town with that name.

53: Helio is all over Marco's rear bumper. Not passing though. Might not need to since if there's no yellow Helio could be the only car to go the distance on two stops.

54: Looks like Power got around Simona for 5th. Didn't see it though. Her crew says she will be 2 short of going all laps on one more stop. Life is 2 short.

55: Wilson around Lloyd on the replay. Number nine. That was for 10th so Alex has dropped a couple spots.

57: Marco into the pits. Helio leads again. After the stop Marco only drops to 4th. Dixon and Dario ahead of him.

59: Very brief mention of The Grahmerican. He's in 17th.

60: Another bunch of overtaking of Milka. Meanwhile Viso spun for some reason, but doesn't stall and soldiers on. No replay on what happened.

60: Dixon pits. Dario must have pitted earlier. Helio is ahead of them all by over 20 seconds. Laying the smack down.

61: Helio rolls into the pit box. Here comes Marco and...Marco will get ahead of him. Dixon, Power and Dario now round out the Top 5.

62: Wilson carefully overtakes his teammate Conway for pass number 10. Rejoice.

65: Quick math: Helio went from 32 to 61 on a tank, all green flag laps. He's gonna cut it real close to finish without pitting again. Not impossible though.

66: Meanwhile Marco will definitely be a couple laps short on his current fuel. Where's a spinning Bryan Herta when you really need him?

67: Milka goes off course but no yellow. Replays show Marco's strategist Kyle Moyer shouting "Crash! Crash!" at the monitors. Insert me spewing coffee on my laptop.

68: Danica tries to help her teammate by hip-checking Alex Lloyd into a spin. No stall and no yellow, though. Sorry, Marco.

71: Up front Helio is all over Marco like a cheap suit, trying to force him into a mistake. Meanwhile they're closing in on Marco's teammate and Helio's rival - TOny Kanaan. Gird your loins, fellas.

72: Behind Marco and Helio, Dixon is about a second back. Meanwhile Dario is 17 seconds back in 4th. Power is 27 seconds behind the leaders in 5th.

75: Andretti Autosport has not won in 27 races (Richmond '08). Without a yellow it's going to be 28. We're just waiting to see if there's a yellow in the4 next dozen laps at this point.

78: Marco is right behind Rahal right now. Massive airtime for Sarah Fisher Racing and Dollar General.

82: Drama averted as Marco pits. No tires, just fuel.

83: Helio and Dixon go around Rahal, so that's a dozen televised overtakes. It's Helio, Dixon, Dario, Power, Marco. I think the Ganassi cars need to pit, but I could be wrong.

84: Wilson around Kanaan. 13 televised overtakes, roughly half of which are by Justin Wilson, now in 7th.

85: Simona is stalled on the inside of turn for a local yellow...wait, now it's a full course caution. Time to bunch them up.

86: Arute reminds us at the start of the race at St Pete "Marco carved himself like a hot knife through butter." Ouch!

87: I guess the Ganassi cars don't need to pit, which means we can look forward to watching Dixon try to jump the start on Helio. That would be a nice bookend to this event.

88: Back to GREEN! Both Helio and Dixon are "on the button" so no passing occurs up front.

89: White flag for Helio, who probably furiously mashing the Push To Not Be Passed button.

90: And Helio is your winner, meaning Team Penske is now 3 for 3 in 2010. Dixon, Dario, Power, Marco round out the Top 5. Now we get to see if they have any fencing in Alabama that's suitable for climbing.

Yup, they got fencing for Spiderman to climb.

Post-race interviews deployed. Scott Dixon is complaining "I think the officials screwed us at the start". Don't be whiny, Scott. Not after driving so well today.

Meanwhile Helio is talking about his baby daughter. Looking into the camera at me in my living room Drops a "fun-tastic" in there for good measure. He's giving a master course in media savvy.

Marco has put the shades with the red lenses back on. Sounds low-key, but glad to be in the Top 5. Somehow his hair is still vertical despite wearing a helmet for the last two-plus hours. Impressive.

Well, that's it for me. I counted just 13 televised overtakes, although if you include the times Milka Duno got passed that number easily doubles. Congrats Barber on your beautiful facility, to Marco for making it interesting (sorta), and to Helio and Team Penske for getting it done today. Thank you very much folks, and good night.

Welcome to St Pete where...it's wet. Very wet. With lots of wind. And lightning. And puddles so deep they might be harboring alligators. And while that might add an extra level of excitement for race fans in the comfort of their homes, it's a living nightmare for the IRL logistical staff as well as the drenched fans seeking cover in Florida.

When the powers that be figure out when this baby will be raced I'll be glad to tell you all about it. For now, well, the intrepid Curt Cavin just tweeted "There is NO CHANCE this race is held today. NONE!"

After the weather-related fiascoes to start the 2010 season, I wonder if Randy Bernard is starting to plan ways to have indoor races.

UPDATE: Looks like the race will be at 10am ET on ESPN2, which is 7am for those of us at or near the west cost. It's like breakfast at Wimbledon for IndyCar fans.

(Ladies and gentleman, once again My Name Is IRL proudly welcomes guest commentary from a man who evidently spent the last six months learning Portuguese. Still at home and still enjoying the amenities of the comfy couch, it's the one, the only, the mmack.)

Notas do sofá comfy Sao Paolo Indy 300

Olá! e leitores bem-vindos! It' tempo de s para notas do sofá comfy.

(Hello and welcome readers! It’s time for notes from the comfy couch.) Mrs. Mmack and I were rudely awakened to the fact that today ends Daylight Savings Time. Luckily we got to see the end of the F1 race, and had time enough to prepare an American version of a traditional Brazilian breakfast. At first I thought this meant a sword with ten pieces of steak skewered on it, but Mrs. Mmack informed me that 1) we have no swords handy and 2) the meat on a sword dish is Argentinean, not Brazilian. At least we have mimosas made with mango-papaya to tide us over. Kudos to the Fabulous Mrs. Mmack for Googling what folks in Brazil have for Pequeno almoço.

From watching Versus on Saturday, I’ve learned that qualifications were suspended until this morning. Part of the track is used as the Sambadrome for Carnival, and the street was PAINTED for the samba parade! Even after removing the paint, that section of the track caused much mayhem in practice. After grinding the surface over night, qualifications were held today with Dario Franchitti (Oh não outra vez!) and Alex Tagliani (Que boa surpresa!) sharing the front row.

After some indecision over is it/isn’t it raining hard enough to postpone the start, the drivers are instructed to start their motores and after the pace laps, the first green flag of the Dois mil e dez IRL season flies!

And it’s soon followed by the inevitable first yellow flag of the 2010 IRL season. Cars are spinning, crashing, flipping, landing atop each other, Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria! Mario Moraes decides to even the score with Marco Andretti by leapfrogging his car atop Marco’s #26 machine. During replays of the first lap crash we see the dreaded accordion effect at the head of the field, with Sato torpedoing another car and then getting caught up with Dixon and Castroneves. Helio even runs over Sato’s front wing. At this point the survivors head to the pits for service while Jack Arute, looking less like a human and more like a walking stick of beef jerky (Jack, George Hamilton called, he wants to warn you about the effects of too much sun) tries to interview Mario Moraes and Marco. Mario is evidently too angry to talk, but Marco calmly talks to Jack about the big wreck. Mrs Mmack thinks he got some Thorazine in the track medical center. I think that after 100 million interviews about crashes he’s started or been caught up in, Marco is pretty blasé about these things. A replay shows Moraes going sideways trying to slow down before he vaults over Marco.

At this point, with hardly any racing at all, obviously pole sitter Franchitti leads, followed by Tags. On lap 9 the race restarts and everybody left is a good boy or girl and follows single file through the turns of the first actual green flag lap. Going from memory (Hey, YOU try writing notes with one hand and drinking a mimosa with the other and see how much you get written buddy!), the front two positions were pretty set for the next ten laps or so, but from third on back, dare I say it, we saw some passing. On a street course no less. Now granted, some of that was Castroneves and Dixon fighting their way up from having to pit for work on their cars, but Dan Wheldon (!) and Ryan Hunter-Reay(!!), you know, two guys better known for their oval prowess, were actually making moves and advancing to the front. Within a lap of each other, Ryan took second from Tags and Wheldon took fifth place.

And then Milka Duno stalled on the course. Que surpresa, or for Milka, en español: Una qué sorpresa. For some reason this means we have to have a full course caution. Everyone pits except for Simona de Silvestro, who stays out to take the lead. Her first race and she’s already ahead of Danica Patrick! Hey, maybe one prediction I made will be correct.

Speaking of predictions, Jack Arute breaks in to tell us those dark clouds we keep seeing in the distance are rain clouds, and they’re headed right for us. Ah, sunny Brazil!

The race restarts around lap 27 with Simona being chased by Dario and O-Ryan the Hunter. RHR takes Mr. Ashley Judd and then sets off after Simona. On the next lap he forces his way past her with a shower of sparks from the undertray of his car. With rain coming in Penske pulls in Ryan Briscoe to change to rain tires. On track, suddenly Tony Kanaan and an unseen car go skidding off into a run-off. A replay shows Dan Wheldon prefers slam dancing to the samba, and shoves Alex Tagliani into TK. TK gets back on track but no Tagliani.

After that the rain comes. And with it, those that stay out on slicks perform beautiful pirouettes on track for the fans, including Danica Patrick. Perhaps if Danica had more experience in stock cars, she would have avoided that spin. Sorry, I must have channeled ol’ DW there.

Now it begins to rain harder as we see Alex Lloyd’s car in the wall. The rain is now mixed with HAIL, and timing and scoring is knocked out! So on lap 36, the race is red flagged so we can dry the track and the drivers can have a siesta. I should NEVER have made fun of NASCAR for the delays in this year’s Daytona 500. Karma, it’s a buzz kill.

When the race restarts, it will be a timed race. Before the rain came teams gambled on when to put on the rain tires. With the track starting to dry out, now teams have to decide when to go back to slicks. Briscoe Inferno, O-Ryan the Hunter, and Will Power blink first and duck in for slicks. This gives the race lead back to Franchitti. The race restarts and there’s a lot of position shuffling as cars hit the pits to get slicks back on. RHR takes the lead and there is an actual battle from second to fourth with Power, Briscoe, and Matos. Castroneves is also trying to move up.

Somewhere in here Bob Jenkins announces this race is now the most viewed telecast in Brazilian television history. I think to myself of course it is. Everyone is calling everyone else saying something like “Hey, turn on channel 12, yeah, the Indy Car race. This one car jumped on top of another, yeah, IT WAS GREAT!”

At this point Ryan Briscoe comes up to second as we are told Ryan Hunter-Reay must MAKE FUEL. It is now a timed, fuel conservation race. Great! The announcing staff debates the merits of RHR staying in the lead versus falling back to second and pacing off Briscoe. Soon the point becomes academic because Briscoe passes RHR, but then RHR passes him back to retake the lead! Except that both drivers cut the corners and took short cuts through the turns while trying to pass each other. RHR has to give the lead back to Briscoe, and falls into the clutches of Will Power. A few laps later Briscoe plucks defeat from the jaws of victory and flies straight as an arrow into the tire barriers. With the resulting yellow, all that race leader RHR needs to worry about is Will Power.

With about six minutes to go, the race restarts with Ryan Hunter-Reay being chased by Will Power. Somehow, Vitor Meira, in the AJ Foyt Racing #14, has gotten up to third place. Behind him is all manner of slicing and dicing that portends mechanized chaos. Up at the front, Will Power makes a move and takes the lead from RHR. Ryan can’t get close enough before the finish to try to retake the lead, so the finish is Power, Hunter-Reay, and Meira for the podium. Although it’s not a win, hopefully Ryan’s strong run convinces Izod to write a full season check to Michael Andretti.

And for all the talk about Simona de Silvestro, let’s give a hand to Brazilian rookie Ana Beatriz, who finished ahead of both Simona and Danica in 13th spot, and is also the highest finishing rookie in the race.

In closing, even with all the rain, some dreaded “lock-step”, and a first lap that would embarrass the field in a bomber stock race at the Grundy County Speedway, the Sao Paolo course offered some actual racing, with at least three good passes for the lead.

Adeus do sofá comfy, everyone, until the next race at St. Petersburg.

Welcome to Brazil, where the 2010 IZOD IndyCar season is about to kick off for the first time outside the friendly confines of the US borders. But it's all good - Jack Arute is there to make Sao Paolo feel just as awkward as any other race.

Today's race features 7 Brazilians racing in their homeland. IRL regulars Helio Castroneves, Tony Kanaan, Rafa Matos and a freshly healed Vitor Meira will join rookies Mario Romancini and Ana Beatriz, and thanks to a last minute deal Mario Moraes will be racing as well. Collectively they might outsell Danica Patrick at the merchandise trailer this weekend.

The big story this weekend is that yesterdays qualifications were canceled due to a slippery straightaway. The front section is part of what's none as the Sambadrome, although after removing the surface paint from the recent Carnivale festivities the concrete track was more like the ice at the Saddledome. The slippery surface might have been some nefarious plot to eliminate passing altogether on a street course, but Brian Barnhart called in the grinders overnight and now it appears we have a sufficient racing surface.

So we have a serious test of of the off-season conditioning today, as this morning they've had a practice session, qualifications, and now the race. Let's hope the drivers did their workouts workouts, are properly hydrated, and have made all other necessary preparations...



...because after a loooooong winter IT'S TIME TO START!

0: Dario Franchitti will be starting from the pole today. Arute is stuffing the mic in his face, and Dario does not disappoint. Says for Brian Barnhart "had to have really big attachments" to cancel qualifications yesterday. I just spewed coffee.

0: Alex Tagliani, in his first race for his the FAZZT Racing team he co-owns, is starting next to Dario on the front row. Justin Wilson and part-timer Ryan Hunter-Reay are starting in Row 2. Bully for the little guys!

0: And...we have a little rain. Now they have to figure out if they need to change tires. Jack Arute is showing us the weather radar, pointing to multi-colored blots. It appears it's May in Brazil.

0: Well, the pace car circled the track and I guess it's not too wet.

0: The most sedate man in Sao Paolo announces "...drivers, start your engines..."

0: OK, we have red tires, black tires, and our first chance to see IndyCars with a reverse gear. Hopefully this will help avoid a few yellow flags. On a personal note, I'd love to see the winner of this race circle the track in reverse for a super-slow victory lap.

0: For those interested, we have 5 rookies. Beatriz and Romancini, along with Takuma Sato, Simona de Silvestro, and Alex Lloyd. Quite a diverse group.

0: ...and finally We Are GREEN GREEN GREEN!

0: HOLY GOAT RODEO, BATMAN!!! What a messed up first turn! In what is possibly the worst start EVAH to an IRL race we see Helio, Dixon, and Sato are spinning, lots of cars through the run off, and Mario Moraes's Dallara is on top of Marco Andretti's head!

1: Marco is still stuck in that car and under that other car. A little help over here, please.

2: Arute tells us Marco has contacted his team through the in-car radio that he is OK. That's amazing - three sincere cheers for Dallara safety!

3: Replays show that Sato got loose entering the first turn causing the first mess. Moraes looks like he was spinning as well before he gassed his car over the back of Marco's. Boom, zoom, crash! (Warning: I'm fast exceeding my exclamation point quotient.)

4: Marco is out of the car, walking to the ambulance. Applause all around. Franchiti, Tagliani, Hunter-Reay...wait, now Power is third and Ryan is 4th? What? How are we passing under yellow?

5: Looks like some cars are pitting, none of the leaders though. A crane has arrived to remove what's left of Marco's car. Power makes a pit stop, so Hunter-Reay is back in 3rd. Kanaan and Matos round out the top 5.

6: Moraes declines to be interviewed by Arute. These aren't the droids you're looking for, Jack. Meanwhile, Marco has been checked, released, and will no doubt be tracked down by the very busy Arute.

7: Just got a shot of Romancini's car. Bright white with green "DOLLY" on the side. Now I have Louis Armstrong singing in my head.

8: Might be going green again soon. Gird your loins for the battle in the first turn, folks.

9: Restart on and we are once again GREEN GREEN GREEN!!! Through turn one, then two, then three, and we are in full parade mode.

10: Arute tracks down Marco, who seems fairly even headed about the whole thing. Said "couldn't see a foot in front of you" and that he was letting off on the gas, inferring the kind sould behind him might not have been so cautious. Marco might still be a bit woozy from having a 1500lb car sitting on his head for a few minutes.

11: Dixon has recovered nicely from that first lap fracas. He's already up to 9th, while Helio is back in 16th. Meanwhile Sato is parked in the pits. 20 drivers on the lead lap, with only Alex Lloyd a lap down after having to have some parts changed earlier.

12: Well, it looks like Milka just got lapped, so make that 19 cars on the lead lap.

14: Top 4 are pulling away, with Dan Wheldon all up in Rafa Matos' business for 5th.

15: Wheldon, Mutoh, Vitor, Danica, Conway comprise 6th through 10th, in case you were wondering. NO PENSKE CARS in the Top 10!

18: And Wheldon has gotten around Matos for 5th. Looks like Wheldon is moving up invisibly through the field. Would have been nice to see some actual overtaking. *banging head on laptop*

19: RHR passes Tags for P2. Hooray for televised passing!

20: Kanaan tries to get around Tagliani, but can't quite get er done. Locks the brakes but maintains control, drawing the applause of the crowd.

22: YELLOW for a stalled Milka Duno on the course. Why a full course caution? I don't know, and I'm getting tired of asking during these street races. I guess they can't just push her to a runoff with a local yellow...but what do I know.

24: Pits are open...and EVERYONE comes in. Nice and orderly. All drivers are on their best behavior. Looks like first out are Dario, Hunter-Reay, Kanaan, Tagliani, and Wheldon.

25: Hold the phone - one car did not pit: Simona de Silvestro, who now leads the race. She pitted right before the yellow so this is legit. You go girl!

26: Looks like the rain is coming in. Jack says "I'm starting to feel like the hippy-dippy weatherman." *another spit take*

27: Back to GREEN. Hang on, Simona - here they come! Hunter Reay is all over Dario's rear wing. Works him the entire lap and finally gets him in the last turn for P2.

28: RHR is driving like a man possessed. Takes the inside line, sparks flying from the bumps, and rockets past Simona for the lead.

29: The hippy-dippy weatherman says rain is coming.

29: Ruh-roh! Tagliani tangles with Kanaan and they both slide into the run-off. Oh, they Brazilian fans will not be pleased.

29: Hang on, replay shows Dan Wheldon punted Tags who spun into Kanaan. Meanwhile Briscoe pulls into the pits to change to rain tires...and here comes the rain!

30: Kanaan is back on the the track, and while we were looking at the accident it seems Dario got around Simona for second.

30: Lots of cars pulling into the pits to change for rain tires, but a few stay out. Curous call for those who stay out, as we see Beatriz, Danica, and Romancini spinning around, all without contact. It's like ice capades with cars. Quite graceful actually.

30: Full course yellow now as Alex Lloyd has made contact with the wall. Probably had an ungraceful spin, but we have no replays.

31: Rain is really coming down now. Arute suggests the way this weekend is going locusts might not be far behind. Looks like puddles are forming, which as I recall caused some significant delays at the race at St Pete a couple years ago.

32: Oh by the way, the leaders are RHR, Dario, Swiss Miss, Dixon, Wheldon. Meanwhile it appears Romancini has spun yet again. Hello Dolly!

33: Now Bob Jenkins says that Timing & Scoring is messed up and your actual Top 5 are RHR, Power, Dario, Dixon and Conweazy. Hmm. I think I liked the other Top 5 better.

36: Red flag. Everybody park it.

36: Arute with Tags, who is out of the race. He's not enraged, which is disappointing since I was hoping he'd go after Wheldon in the pits now. The only thing this race is missing a good dust up. Well, that and locusts.

36: Laps, schmaps - we're going to have a timed race. Just like that puddle-rific race in St Pete a few years ago. I thought this timed nonsense ended when the IRL went to VERSUS, but I guess that's not the case.

36: All the drivers are out of their cars, waiting for the signal to race for 45 minutes. It's like halftime at a soccer match. Meanwhile dozens of Brazilians with brooms are furiously sweeping water off the course.

36: Arute with Will Power, asking him "...what to do in the middle of a race in Rio?" Yes, he said Rio. That's our Jack! Meanwhile we learned that the Aussie is eating a banana and honey sandwich - what, not vegemite?

Ed Note: Shane Rogers, the International Superstar, tweets thusly: "Vegemite might be on short supply in Brazil, I condone the choice of Banana and Honey as the T sandwich for Will Power."

36: To kill time VERSUS is showing us 2012 chassis designs. Dallara, Swift, Lola, BAT and OH LOOK AT THIS AMAZING DELTAWING. Time for me to go make my own banana and honey sandwich.

36: Man, this race seems almost as long as the off-season.

36: Drivers are putting the helmets back on. The "Up With People" show better be wrapping ups because this IndyCar halftime show is almost over.

36: The command is given on pit road to fire the engines, so away the roll. The sun is shining and the track is drying, so the game of "how long do you race on grooved tires" begins.

36: Still under yellow with the sun shining on puddles, Briscoe, RHR, Power all pit for slicks. And there's still a lot of puddles on the course. Somewhere pressdog is readying the clown cars.

37: Franchitti, Dixon, Conway, Wilson, Vitor are now the Top 5. Other cars are pitting for slicks as well.

-38 (minutes): I have to change the notation since this is a timed race.

-36: GREEN GREEN GREEN. Target cars lead the way. Oh joy.

-35: Helio passes Viso for 5th, and Viso passes him right back. Look, racing!

-33: Drivers on slicks are marching through the field as RHR, Power, Briscoe up to 8th, 9th, and 10th respectively.

-30: Wilson and Helio have had enough of this nonsense and pit for slicks. Dixon as well. Hunter-Reay up to 2nd now and gunning for Dario.

-29: Dario pits. RHR has the lead with Will Power chasing him 3 seconds back. MMatos Briscoe and Vitor round out the Top 5. Much furious jockeying for position here.

-27: Hunter-Reay is up by six seconds plus. The Big Hyphen is opening up the can of of Whoop-Ass. It's chaos behind him as Power, Briscoe and Matos battle for 2nd.

-24: Briscoe is 2nd, now only 4 seconds back. It might be a Ryan-Ryan finish. Matos third, Power fourth.

-21: Ryan Hunter-Reay drives an IZOD sponsored car. This is IZOD's first race as series sponsor. Go ahead and start your own "the call" rumors.

-20: Romancini has smacked the wall, but he limps around without drawing a full-course caution. Golf clap here for Mario.

-18: Briscoe has caught up to the other Ryan, but that might be because there's some fuel conservation going on.

-17: Briscoe takes the lead...and then Hunter-Reay takes it back, but only when they both go side-by-side and take a shortcut through a turn. It's in the IHJ's hands now.

-16: The IHJ says RHR has to give back the position. Hunter-Reay surrenders the lead but lookie here it's Will Power all over his rear bumper! It's a three-way battle for fuel conservation!

-15: On a positive note, at least they have to conserve with their foot instead of the knob, since the multiple fuel mappings are GONE from the cockpit. Hallelujah!

-13: Still Briscoe, Hyphen, Power, with Matos and Vitor 8 seconds back.

-12: Whoopsie! Briscoe misses a turn and goes into the tires. So much for that Ryan-Ryan finish. Hunter-Reay retakes the lead, and we now have a full course caution. Tick tick tick...

-10: Hyphen, Power, Matos, Meira, Wheldon. Dixon and Dario lurking in 6th and 8th.

-8: This is actually lap 56 for those of your scoring at home. Or even if you're by yourself. *rimshot*

-6: Back to GREEN GREEN GREEN! Hunter-Reay and Will Power launch from the rest in not time at all.

-5: Vitor gets around Matos in a Brazilian battle for third. Vitor is smelling that podium in his first race in 9 months.

-3: Will Power, the Towoomba Tornado, sizes up Hunter-Reay and...and...and he's by for the lead! Tick...tick..tick...

-2: Here's the part where I tell my kids "I told ya Will Power would win, didn't I?" And they nod, because it's easier to beat Shane Rogers in a Vegemite eating contest than it is to best Power on a street circuit. (And Shane is all about the Vegemite, friends.)

-1: Dixon and Dario are battling for 6th. Getting dicey. Easy boys, you're going to be teammates all year. Meanwhile, white flag for Will Power, powered by bananas and honey.

0: It's Power, Hunter-Reay, Meira as the opening race is done. Man, I feel like I've been blogging this race for the last four hours...wait!

Will emerges, acknowledges the crowd and pulls bandages off his fingers. His hands are a bloody mess, and I don't mean that in the way Brits swear. Seriously, he looks like he's been in one of the MMA cage match deals. That's the price of victory.

Congrats to Will for showing Roger Penske he made the right call by getting him a full season deal. Puts that wreck in practice at Infineon last year waaaay in the rear view mirror. I may just sign up for Verizon as a sign of support. Also congratulations to Ryan Hunter-Reay for being up near the front all day. Ain't no shame in his part-time game.

No offense to those two fine gentlemen but the biggest hand of the day goes to Foyt Racing's Vitor Meira, who was last seen at Indy being pulled from a broken car with some freshly broken vertebrae. Months of rehab later he emerges as the top Brazilian in the homeland race. If anyone knows how to say "Way to go, Vitor!" in Portuguese I'll gladly second that exclamation.

And since AJ Foyt's team made the podium, you know what that means? Some quality Brazilian steakhouse is gonna get taken down tonight!

Well, that's going to be a wrap here. We had racing surface issues, weather issues, time issues, Arute issues, but in the end some sense of familiarity is restored as Will Power once again wins on a street course. The season is underway, and for the time being none of the three drivers who were battling for the series title last year are in the Top 5. Hope springs eternal. Thank you very much - good night!

It has taken be a mere four years of writing about the subject to realize it, but when it comes to IndyCars I know nothing. I mean, I know a few things like EJ Viso's hat size, the date of Dario and Ashley's nuptials, as well as entry code to Chip Ganassi's super secret underground lair. But beyond that? Pfft - nothing.

Which is exactly the reason I am not making any predictions for the 2010 season. Who wins the Indy 500? Don't know. Who wins the IZOD IndyCar series championship? Probably one of five guys, but beyond that I'll guess with ya. What kind of tragic karmic payback will befall ESPN for not renewing Jack Arute's contract? I shudder to think.

So I am asking you, dear reader, to stake you claim now in the Comments section now, before the 2010 season actually starts. Make you prediction. Call your champion. Call the first out at Indy. Call the number of teams Graham Rahal races for this year. Call the number of times Danica Patrick says "you know" on live television. Call your mom. I don't care what you predict, but whatever you do put it writing now so you can have bragging rights about it later.

We're about a month away from the start of the season, which means the shotgun-marriages that are last-minute driver deals are coming fast and furious. Or furiously. Or whatever. Months of courting by teams, drivers, and their respective financiers is finally resulting in actual paper-and-ink contracts, and since the driver count for the 2010 IZOD IndyCar Series season has expanded beyond the number of fingers on even Antonio Alfonseca's hands it's high time we got ourselves a head count.

The latest announcement came yesterday out of Japan, where Hideki Mutoh...wait, wrong guy...I meant to say former Formula One driver Takuma Sato has inked a deal to race fulltime for KV Racing Technologies. Start your own "Has he ever raced an oval?" hysteria amongst yourselves if you want, but first here's a word from Sato.



Speaking of KV, many folks on twitter have noticed that EJ Viso seems to be preparing to join Sato, although again nothing is etched in stone. He hasn't explicitly said "I-Heart-K-V" (which in his native tongue would be more like "Yo-corazon-K-V" but with proper punctuation), but that's the impression people are getting after he tested with KV recently.

Also, it should be noted that former F1 development driver (for Honda, no less) James Rossiter is (a) on twitter, (b) following only a few people including the KVRT account as well as KV co-owner Jimmy Vasser, and (c) tweeting about getting fitted for seat and going to Indianapolis for medical evaluations. And that is all I have to say about that.

So here is the tally of FULL TIME drivers thus far.

Target Chip Ganassi Racing: Scott Dixon, Dario Franchitti
Team Penske: Helio Castroneves, Ryan Briscoe, Will Power
Andretti Autosport: Tony Kanaan, Marco Andretti, Danica Patrick
Panther Racing: Dan Wheldon
KV Racing Technologies: Takuma Sato
Dreyer & Reinbold Racing: Justin Wilson, Mike Conway
AJ Foyt Enterprises: Vitor Meira
Luczo, Dragon, de Ferran etc: Raphael Matos
FAZZT Racing: Alex Tagliani

So that's 13.. 14.. 15 so far, but Viso and Rossiter could bump that up to a 2008 Champ Car level of participation. Plus Sarah Fisher, Jay Howard, Ryan Hunter-Reay, and Davey Hamilton have been confirmed for 4-9 races each, so it's not IndyCarpocalpse Now just yet. Also, don't forget that guys like Mario Moraes and Hideki Mutoh are supposed to be walking around with sponsorship cash already in hand, so there's little reason to think they won't be on the grid at Sao Paolo.

As for other teams...

HVM Racing - Robert Doornboos was thought to be a lock her, but on a recent episode of the Trackside radio show HVM owner Keith Wiggins seemed to be hedging away. And today his twitter status read something about a "door closing". Perhaps checks aren't clearing. Next in line would see to be Atlantics graduate Simona DiSilvestro, who has been testing for the team lately.

Dale Coyne Racing: Well, JR Hildebrand has been Uncle Dale's test driver, so this pairing could be a definite maybe. Or maybe Jan Heylen comes out of nowhere. You just never know these days.

Conquest Racing: According to my Google translator, a Brazilian report says Tomas Scheckter will soon be here, and I think it says the team may have up to three drivers. In the immortal words of Baseball great Mark Grace, "Spring hopes eternal".

Team 3G: Perhaps my distant cousin Richard Antinucci will return. Or perhaps Jaques Lazier will come back because he loves it when cars disintegrate under him on the opening lap.

Vision Racing: Umm...well, they are still collecting letters of reference. In the meantime, they're selling non-essential equipment to help pay the bills. If you are in the need for any non-essential equipment, by all means pick up the phone and give them a call.

And then there's Newman Haas Lanigan Racing, about whom there seems to be rampant speculation - all of it bad. Everything from a one-team ride-buyer program to no team at all. It would be convenient of me to not all the drivers and wins this historic organization has enjoyed, but until certain death has been pronounced the eulogy will for now be reserved. In the meantime, let's just say things are very quiet.

Which brings us to the 2010 occupant of the Throne of Injustice: former NHLR driver Graham Rahal. Last year everyone was up in arms that Ryan Hunter-Reay - who was perhaps the only driver not named "Danica" featured in an ad campaign - was without a ride. But at the last minute he got a deal with Vision, but then trouble hit and he was out of a ride, but then Vitor Meira got hurt so Tony George loaned him to AJ Foyt's team, and in the meantime we got to see that famous commercial with Ryan about 10,432 times. In the end, everything was indeed going to be alright. Heh heh.

But now the unsigned driver for whom all hearts bleed is young Graham Rahal, the Son of 'Stache who dared to win a couple pole positions and stand on a couple other podiums, often taking on the role of Ralphie while last year Chip Ganassi and Roger Penske were taking turns abusing the field like they were Scut Farkus and Grover Dill. I don't know where Graham will end up, I don't know when he'll end up there, but I do know he's definitely not going to USF1.

As enjoyable as IndyCar racing is there's always room for improvement. Not that anyone is asking me, but here are just a few ideas off the top of my head:

• Finding a fiscally viable way to return to historic ovals in Phoenix and Michigan
  
• Having pit assignments based on something more dynamic than points standings
  
• Adopting names like soccer teams, such as "Arsenal", "Juventus" or "Penske 1812"
  
• Ripping "the knob" off to deter passing-free festivals of fuel conservation

I know these are all simply nutty ideas that will never be implemented, but...hold the phone! What did Honda Performance Development Technical Division manager Roger Griffiths (and yes, that's EXACTLY what it says on his driver's license) just say?

"Right now, we are in discussion with the IZOD IndyCar Series to remove the fuel-mixture switch from the car completely. This would make the driver responsible for controlling the amount of fuel consumed with his or her right foot."

Excuse me while I repeatedly pound the "OMG!" key on my laptop.

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!