You knew eventually this had to happen, right? Your humble host gets through enough interviews that the ego starts swellin’, the ideas start gellin’, next thing you know BOOM it’s time for internet to have another podcast.

And so it is that My Name Is IRL proudly presents it’s first ever podcast – the “I Am Mindy Show”. Based on audience reaction it might also be the last ever podcast, but hopefully you’ll find something of value in this effort.

A word of warning: this isn’t your typical “two guys talking in a library” podcast because I couldn’t in good conscience turn out something that sounded about as lively as a Tony George press conference.

Anyhow, here’s the show, which among other things features the fourth actual verbal conversation between me and pressdog. For real.

Years ago during NFL (that's American football for those of you outside of the US of A) games there was a commercial feature caled "IBM presents: You Make the Call" where a weird play would be shown and you the viewer would get to decide if Eric Dickerson scored a touchdown or Terry Bradshaw fumbled or whatever. There's no equivalent in racing - or any other sport - because football has so many rules that literally no single person on earth knows all of them.

Racing is usually much simpler, but every once in a while something happens that's either the fault of Driver A, Driver B, or simply "one of them racin' deals". Today, we have such an example.

Here is footage from the A1GP race last Saturday or Sunday, depending upon your hemisphere. For those who do not know of A1GP it is a World Cup style of formula racing, where each team represents a nation. And they're all driving Ferraris. There are certainly worse forms of racing.

What you are about to see happened right before the start of the Sprint race feature, which may confuse stock car fans because it has nothing to do with mobile phones or "The Cup". Why might you ask am I discussing A1GP footage? Because the first car you see launching is driven by none other than American driver Marco Andretti.



Here's the Harry Callas voice-over for today's "You Make The Call": "As the race is about to start in Malaysia, Marco Andretti of Team America (World Police?) appears to accelerate, while directly in front of him Team India's Narain Karthikeyan slows down, resulting in Andretti launching over the back of Karthikeyan. Who's at fault? You make the call."

Marco said he was shifting up when it appeared everyone was suddenly slowing down, but I gotta admit it sure looke like he suffered a brain cloud at the start. Confirming this was this picture from the A1GP site.


Uh oh. Looks like Marco jumped the gun before the green light was on.

However, check out the next picture from a car behind Andretti.


Now, I don't know about your eagle eyes, but I sure as heck can't see any freaking red lights down the course from that cockpit. The best I could tell is that a driver in Marco's position probably needed to be watching the cars in front of him and not trying to squint for red or green in the distance.

So - you make the call. What happened here?

As a footnote, all cars were repaired in time for the Feature race where Andretti finished third. Hooray for America!

(Thanks to our buddy meesh for finding the video.)

Since there’s no actual racing to discuss the predominant conversation for IRL fans has revolved around the question “Who’s gonna replace Helio?” Many journalists are openly suggesting Ryan Hunter-Reay or Justin Wilson or Oriol Servia because they’re good drivers who are unemployed. Many fans are hoping, begging, pleading that that Roger Penske bring back Sam Hornish Jr because he’s been there and done that quite well. One word butcher even suggested that The Captain might be looking to hand-pick a driver named Vitor from another team.

This just shows there are lots of options for Team Penske, which means that (a) they’ll likely end up with a good driver and (b) whoever it is will be second-guessed the first time they faltered. Look how many people were suggesting Ryan Briscoe should be fired after his first few races in 2008. Come on, you know who you are – don’t try to act like that didn’t happen.

But forget the Briscoe Inferno for just a moment and allow me to express a personal opinion on who should be his teammate for 2009. (That is, the best driver other than Helio Castroneves, who IS the best driver available.) A premier team like Penske needs not just a replacement but THE BEST replacement, so after careful consideration I’d like to offer my two cents who would be the best option for everyone.


For real. I’m not joking. Seriously. I really think Marco is the guy.

Remember that for Roger Penske the primary goal every year is to win the Indy 500, or should I say yet another Indy 500. Winning that race brings everything else, and taking the checkers 14 times as an owner has allowed him to pretty much write his own checks in racing. It is the goose that lays his golden eggs.

Now consider how Marco Andretti has fared in exactly three Indy 500s.

2006 - Marco was passed for the lead between the final turn and the yard of bricks, finishing 2nd at The Brickyard at only 19 years of age.

2007 - Marco brief leads a rain-filled race, crashing while battling in the Top 10 right before the race is called.

2008 - Marco again leads 15 laps before eventually falling behind Scott Dixon and Vitor Meira, lock-stepping his way to 3rd.

In three races he’s got two Top 3 finishes and has led 30 laps, all by the age of 21. And, as John Oreovicz points out, he’s quite possibly still a free agent.

Unless the team chose not to publicize it, Marco still has not re-signed with Andretti Green Racing. Many observers believe Marco will not achieve his full potential until he gets away from AGR, the team owned by his father, Michael. And what an opportunity Penske would offer to the 21-year-old! Grandfather Mario drove Indy cars for Penske from 1976-80 and would certainly endorse this career move.

I know, I know. You’re saying “Jeff, come on, we know why you’re doing this. You’ve already told us how you want to see Marco win the 500.” Yes, and thank you for mentioning that, because not only does it show you've been a frequent reader here but it’s also my next point.

Look, we’ve got a crisis on our hands with this Helio trial. One of the two most recognizable names from the series might be gone, which means we’re back to having Danica! as the primary representative of the sport. We need someone else to step up and garner some Q Ratings, and no one other than Mrs Hospenthal would bring more attention by winning at Indy than Young Marco. No offense to Vitor Meira, but if he wins it’s a week of interviews. If a guy named “Andretti” wins, it’s a lot more.

So you’ve got good driver at Indy and a marketable name – what could be better? Well, don’t forget the fact that he wouldn’t be racing for his dad anymore. The AGR team has at times turned into Comedy Central, what with Michael trying to figure out how to respond to incidents involving his son and other teammates, most notably at Infineon in ’07 and Indy in ’08. If Marco went to drive for Team Penske it would not only take away that conflict of interest, but it might also get Marco’s ever present grandfather out from hovering around and casting his long shadow over the AGR team. Allowing Michael to just be team owner and not family man on race weekends might actually add back the years to his life he’s lost watching Marco turn his cars upside-down.

And the cherry on top of this is the idea of seeing former combatants Sam Hornish Sr and Marco’s buddy Anthony Fedele chumming around at the Penske holiday party. This is such a win-win-win idea for Penske, for Marco, for Michael, and for the entire IRL that it can’t be ignored.

Unless of course you think it's completely ridiculous.

(Photo: Trackside Online)

Many years (ago) at Toronto, when there were some 60,000 people packed into the grandstands, I said to a friend of mine, “Why would anybody pay $80 to watch 100 feet of cars going by?” I can’t explain street racing, other than it’s worked in big cities because it’s a 3-day festival of noise, drinking, eating and pretty women. It’s not racing, as we know it, and watching a 200 mph Indy car creep around a corner at 20 mph is not exactly thrilling. – Robin Miller, proving that I am not the only person that doesn’t get street racing. No offense to fans of city circuits, but if I ever run into Robin I’ll gladly spot him a Pepsi for this admission.

OK, remember how our new buddy Kevin Lee of the IMS Radio Network warned a few weeks ago about stuff you read on blogs? How it may or may not be true? Well, this time that's the case because in the interest of conversation I'm just going to throw something out at you. If I were Robin I'd be running for a microphone and a TV camera right now, but I'm not so I'm attaching a humongous disclaimer.

WARNING: This is unconfirmed! The information contained in this post is currently for entertainment purposes only.

Alright, now that we have that out of the way we can continue. Here's the deal: I've recently been told by someone who is a lot closer to the goings on of the IRL than your humble host that in lieu of the recent decision to deny Helio Castroneves a delay from his schedule March court date that Team Penske has already decided lock up a different driver for the 2009 season. Could this mean they think the trial will drag on for months? Could it mean they think the evidence against Helio is rock solid? Could it mean he's agreed to plead guilty? I have no idea on any of those.

But wait, there's more. I was also told that the driver that Penske is eyeing is Vitor Meira and that they are negotiating with Foyt Enterprises to buy him out of his newly signed contract. Does this mean Foyt will let Vitor go? Would Tony George try to influence this decision? Who would replace Vitor at Foyt? Sorry, I haven't got a clue.

Once again, WARNING: This is unconfirmed! The information contained in this post is currently for entertainment purposes only.

If this in fact true, and really considering all we've read I don't think this is an entirely a shocking chain of events, it would demonstrate three key points.

1. Roger Penske is most concerned with winning the Indy 500. While the idea of finding a replacement for Helio has been water cooler material for weeks, most of the conversation has focused on drivers like Ryan Hunter-Reay, Oriol Servia or Justin Wilson. Those guys are good drivers, but that's in the context of the entire IndyCar season. Quick question - how many times has Roger Penske won the Indy 500 as an owner? I know many of you know the answer is 14. Now how many "series championships" has he won? Yeah, I don't know either.

That's because it's all about Indy, and since it's all about Indy you go for the best guy there. 2005 winner Dan Wheldon is locked up with Panther, '04 winner Buddy Rice hasn't, well, looked that great lately, and the last two winners are racing for Big Chip. And Sam Hornish Jr still likes gunning for the Top 30 in stock cars, thank you very much. So of the drivers remaining you gotta look at Vitor who finished 2nd twice in the last four years. In fact, he's never finished worse than 12th at the Brickyard, so he's probably the best option if his current owner is willing to consider negotiating his release.

2. Helio's legal prospects do not look good. There's no way to sugar coat this, because you know The Captain would rather go to Indy with a two-time winner driving his car, but if he believes Helio isn't going to be available then it leads to wondering about what Team Penske knows.

Recall that when the news first broke about Helio's tax evasion indictment that Team Penske was listed as being asked to provide evidence. That's probably because they were writing the checks, but we don't know what else. As bad as the thought about Helio going to trial is then dare to ponder this: Helio is not a US citizen, so if Helio is convicted he faces the likelihood that he will be deported. For good. Whether or not he goes to jail. I'm sure it's not his biggest worry at the moment but let's at least get this out there - his IndyCar career could be over RIGHT NOW.

If you happen to have any, please pass the Excedrin...OK, once more, with feeling. WARNING: This is unconfirmed! The information contained in this post is currently for entertainment purposes only.

3. Tony Kanaan is silently weeping. Let's not even get into his personal loss relating to his longtime friend and/or rival, but rather consider how his gamesmanship in silly season played out. Depending on who you believe Kanaan may have been angling for a ride at TCGR or he may have been simply using the negotiations to leverage more money from AGR. The entire issue is clouded because if he had gone to Ganassi he would have been #2 to reigning champion Scott Dixon's #1, and equipment aside Kanaan's not a #2 type of guy.

However, had he known what was going on with Helio, he likely would have been the guy on the top of Team Penske's list today, and he's definitely be top dog next to Ryan Briscoe. As good as Vitor has been at Indy, Kanaan has set a record by leading the race in all seven of his attempts. Sure, he's still winless at the Brickyard, but you know next May just like every other he's going to be a betting favorite (and fan favorite) no matter how his month goes. If he were available one would suspect Roger would be all over him like white on rice.

Again, these are a lot of words for something that isn't yet confirmed. Maybe Robin or Cavin or someone else will verify it all soon, but I thought you all should be in the loop. If nothing else it certainly makes for quite a conversation.

Who needs a cheap laugh? Chuckle, chortle, giggle or snort when appropriate.



“I’m not addicted to smoking or drinking or anything like that, but I like to do other things ... daily ... that nobody knows about.”

That just never gets old. Ever.

I’m old enough to have caught a few of the Sid Collins years, but the voice most prominent in my recollection of Sunday mornings in May by the radio is that of Paul Page. His excitement level goes to 11 and he sometimes shouts like the house is on fire, but on radio that always played well, and even on TV there were plenty of folks who enjoyed years of work Page did at Indy and elsewhere.

Recently some folks have lamented how the names associated with the new Versus (VS) IndyCar broadcast team have not included Page, even mentioning how they “emailed Page”. Now, it’s always a treat here in the 21st century to just fire off a missive and have it come back to the Inbox with a personal reply, but I was intrigued at the prospect of exchanging pleasantries with Paul Page. I mean, he may be announcing dragster races and competitive eating, but he’s still Paul Page.

And glory of glories, not only did I find his email but an actual blog at www.PaulPage.tv. Sweet fancy moses, Paul Page is a word butcher just like me! After taking a moment to add him to the sidebar, I too sent an email asking him about the VS gig. I won’t quote him directly, but I will say he not only confirmed the same names being auditioned like Davey Hamilton, Mike King, Jack Arute, and Jon Beekhuis, but he also said he was told they were only interested in folks who were young, fresh, and vibrant.

Aside from the fact that those adjectives sound more like a Gordon Ramsay menu than a broadcast team, I think anyone with two eyes can confirm that Jack Arute is not young, and he hasn’t been for at least 86 years. But what’s more troubling is that if this is indeed the dictate then there’s zero chance of Derek Daly appearing in the booth, because for all of his faults he’s a lot more interesting as a commentator than Scott Goodyear.

Then again it’s entirely possible someone was giving an excuse to Page along the lines of “you suck for siding with CART a dozen years ago”, although that would purely be conjecture on my part. That could go for Daly as well, I suppose.

I sincerely hope this isn’t the entire list, because it’s not very encouraging to see that there isn’t anyone else out there who might be on the VS radar. Mike King is great on radio, but I don’t know how he’d do on TV where the requirements involve less description and even less shouting. Arute has been in the booth before and from what I recall it didn’t work. His brilliance has been best served in smaller portions. Beekhuis is solid, but I’ve never come away from watching races thinking of a memorable quote of his. Maybe Davey Hamilton will prove an inspirational choice, although he’s so calm I think he’d need to be paired with a total loon to avoid sounding like Goodyear.

I’m not going to criticize the performance of these possible candidates before they’re actually on VS, but in case anyone from the new network is reading right now I’d like to make two suggestions to those responsible for this decision. First, under no circumstances should Todd Harris be allowed on an IndyCar broadcast. Once more, with emphasis: under no circumstances should Todd Harris be allowed on an IndyCar broadcast. He’s already at VS doing cage fighting, and good for him but but please please PLEASE resist the urge to use this available “talent”. I mean it – do not let him within 5 miles of Danica Patrick ever again. 2005 was embarrassing, and we’re only now scrubbing our memories of that horrible season.

More importantly though, I’d like to offer the novel suggestion of finding someone who has recently driven in the IRL to play some part of the broadcast team. If there’s one thing the IRL has recently had in plentiful supply it’s personalities, and surely one of them can be persuaded to jump up in the booth. The ever animated Darren Manning – who is currently without a ride – is the first name that comes to mind. Also young James Davison, who struggled a bit in the Indy Lights but performed well enough to garner attention for his work at Surfer’s Paradise. PJ Chesson might be worth a shot. Also Paul Tracy, or either of the Lazier brothers, or heck, as improbable as it seems even Helio Castroneves might have some free time.

The point is that often IndyCar drivers often end their careers by going off into another slower racing series and then fade into oblivion. Davey Hamilton may be the exception, but his is a rather unique story. The point being with so many unemployed drivers standing around it would be a total waste of resources to not find at least one of them who has some on-air talent and the ambition to show it. Hopefully the VS folks can find someone to chat us up who has the benefit of experience of racing on the current tracks and/or driving the current car.

And whoever it is, I hope they don’t mind having a blog as well.

Jack Arute once famously noted that when Milka Duno speaks excitedly in English she sounds “like a Chihuahua”. Those are, or rather were, his words describing The Towel Incident, although since then Arute or someone like him amended the original line from “Milka went ‘Charo’ and started yipping like a Chihuahua” to simply “Milka went ‘Charo’”. There may or may not have been some negative feedback related to that comparison, probably from a pro-Chihuahua lobbying group.

However even a fun loving linguist like Jack would agree that Milka is certainly more intelligible when talking en Español, and she’s fully coherent when speaking in Spanish while accompanied by English subtitles. Here she is appearing on “Tr3s”, which is some channel with bilingual programming that I’ve never seen, probably because I would need to pay extra to my cable provider would that I ever wanted to watch it. Milkalicious is basically talking about all the super groovy things that go into racing an IndyCar, right down to the overtake button. Of course, she doesn’t actually demonstrate the usage of the overtake button, but ... I’m just going to stop there because that’s a setup that writes its own punchline.



(Thanks to IRL-O-Rama for the finding this glorious video.)

As you may have read elsewhere (you really should be reading is it May yet? daily right now), on Friday the judge in the Taxman v Helio trial gave a big thumbs down to the defendant’s request for delay. The current start date of March 2nd will stand, meaning that until about a month before the season Roger Penske will either be sitting on pins and needles hoping against a 90-plus percentage federal conviction rate hope that Helio emerges from the throes of justice unscathed, or The Captain must soon go about the business of planning 2009 with a different driver in the #3.

Yes friends, it’s now time we all get our brains around this: no matter what, Helio will probably not be driving for Penske next year. Heck, if he gets convicted he may never race again. Let’s all take a deep breath, hold it, grab that wastebasket, and if you must go ahead and vomit the contents of your stomach.

The most appealing solution would be Commissioner Penske to switch on the bat signal, beckoning Sam Hornish Jr from his cave in Defiance, Ohio. It’s too bad Sam and other drivers don’t have their own music of choice played during driver introductions, because the only hope of turning even a temporary loss of Helio into something positive would be to hear Jack Arute or whoever on the opening broadcast shouting in their best Jim Ross, “No! It can’t Be! That’s Sam Hornish Jr’s music! What’s HE doing HERE?”

(OK, I admit to listening to too many Live Fast Racing podcasts. So sue me.)

Unfortunately reality is a lot more boring than that, as Sam has repeatedly said that no matter how much he, uh, struggles in stock cars he’s having a blast and he isn’t coming back to the IRL. So this means The Captain will probably have to go find another driver to replace an otherwise irreplaceable one. There are obviously a lot of “good” drivers out there without jobs, but this is Team Penske where winning in dominant fashion is the goal. Team Penske can put a winning car on the track, they just need a driver who’s comfortable with winning. To that end, allow your humble host to offer a few suggestions for who might best fit this opening.

Seabastien Bourdais – Current Formula One driver (well, maybe), SeaBass kick all kinds of tail in the former Champ CART entity to the tune of four straight championships. We’re talking about a guy who in those four years won 28 of 55 races – that’s INSANE! Plus, having a French guy with ultra Euro glasses would send old school Penske haters to a whole new level.

Lance Armstrong – Seven time consecutive Tour de France champion knows how to turn a wheel in the biggest of events. If you can do a month in France then you can do a month in Indy. As a bonus, folks at the VERSUS network are already familiar with his work and have innumerable “packages” at the ready.

Ronaldinho World-class footballer (read: “soccer player”) has won titles wherever he’s played, proving he’s quite adept at two-hour sporting events that often are utterly boring and without action. Can anyone be better prepared for racing at Infini-yawn? More than anything though he’s Brazilian, which we know has to count for something. I mean, they grow championship-caliber drivers on trees down there.

Julienne Hough – This two-time winner of Dancing With the Stars worked intently with Helio to bring out the best dancer in his pedal-pushing feet. Perhaps, if he’s not incarcerated, Helio could return the favor. She could be just as huge, if not huge-er(?), than Danica, and she’s only got one less win. Bonus points for the sassy, sparkling firesuit potential.

Tiger Woods – I can’t think of a better way to rehab and injured knee than to take some time off by sitting down for a whole year. The guy is as proven a winner as there can be, and if you’ve ever suffered through a golf telecast – and goodness knows U.S. IndyCar fans have had races pre-empted by plenty of them – then you know he certainly has the vocabulary required of a race car driver.

Speed Racer – If you want a young driver with potential than this kid is the benchmark. I’m not sure what his contract status is with his current team, but if this guy can successfully navigate the Casa Cristo then Watkins Glen and Mid-Ohio should be a total walk in the park. Maybe Team Penske could even build auto jacks and rotary saws into their cars.

Chalk one up for the word butchers. Our buddy Will at is it May yet? is so smart that not only can be be a big brain for NASA by day, but by night he can do the work of a serious journalist. Will has been spending this evening on fun stuff like the affidavit filed on behalf of Helio Castroneves asking for an extension from his March court date.

It seems everyone's favorite fence climber worries about the timing of a verdict in such a case. It also seems his boss is more than a bit worried as well. According to Will, the affidavit reads:

[I]f the trial proceeds as scheduled on March 2, Penske Racing will be forced, in all likelihood, to change drivers now to avoid the risk that Mr. Castroneves will be unavailable for the entirety of the 2009 Series.

(MORE from is it May yet?)

Now normally you'd think a two-time winner of the 500 and one of the two most recognizable faces in the IRL would be secure in his job, but the reality is it's a buyers market for teams looking for a quality driver. As Robin recently noted, the current lack of sponsorship available to race teams has left proven drivers like Oriol Servia, Justin Wilson, Will Power and Ryan Hunter-Reay are all pounding the pavement in search of a ride.

As an aside, does anyone know why N/H/L would keep Graham Rahal over Justin Wilson? No offense to the youngster, but he was clearly the lesser of the two drivers this year. Is this an "upside potential" deal or what?